Aed jokes
What does a refrigerator and a gay male have in common?
Only one farts when you pull the meat out. 🌝🌝🌝
Why is Pluto a dwarf planet?
Because it looks like a g-nome.
Ama is a bitch. I want him to die and kill himself.
Your classmate: You're so ugly.
Me: That's what your mom said when she had you and called you a mistake.
I have a taste for some roast duck until the feathers will pop right out and say, "Quack, quack."
Do you put a baby in the microwave covered or uncovered?
Covered, it can take weeks to clean up the explosion.
Yo, look, they give me and my girl free pizza and a big bottle of rabbit wine. Yay, yay! Don't drink too much of it; you might turn into a wine rabbit.
How can you tell that a woman cannot fit through a vent because she got pregnant from a baby elephant? Ain't no telling who's in better shape, the elephant or the woman. I guess it's probably Weight Watchers.
Q: What did the fetus say to the tongs?
A: See you on the flip side.
A teacher says, "What comes before 47?" Quiet kid: "AK!"
You’re so short, you could use a pillow as your bed and still have some wiggle room.
This morning, I was in the kitchen, and I saw a whole bunch of leftover brownies made from scratch. I just tasted one and spit it out because somebody put some goddamn weed in them, what the fuck!
What kind of instrument is always having to go potty?
A pee-ano/piano.
A B C D E F G.
Gummy bears are chasing me, one is red, one is blue. One is chewing up my shoe. Now I'm running for my life because the red one's got a knife!
So one day a boy was at his dad's work when another little boy ran in crying. Then the dad said, "Aw, little boy, are you lost? Where's your parents?" And the little boy at his dad's work said, "OMG! Dad, you can't say that!"
Why can't he say that?
Answer: He works at an orphanage.
What's a rock band that has four men that don't sing?
Mount Rushmore.
What do you do when you get a boy named Jackson? You dump him.
You are so fat that Big Chungus looks like a small Chungus.
One knight, a king, and a queen went fishing. They each caught one fish, so how did three fish end up in the bucket?
One "knight"!!!
When your mom comes in at night then sees your... sleeping, but sees something moving, so she gets a chair and whacks it, then she says, "I thought it was a mouse."