Aed jokes
What's the difference between an orphan and a baby?
The orphan gets back up.
What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and a refrigerator?
The fridge actually runs.
Wolf looks like a fox.
It has the sharpest claws.
It has a bushy tail.
To eat, it doesn't fail.
It has a coat of red.
My grandmother has said,
It hunts in search of food.
It is never, never good!
Foxy the fox was a careless fox. She didn't care about her friend Froggy.
Froggy was a careful frog. One day, Froggy decided to teach the fox a lesson.
Foxy was in her bed sleeping when Froggy made her room an entire mess. She got up, and then her mother berated her for not cleaning her room. From now on, she is a careful fox.
What did Michael Jackson say to the kid on his lap?
"You have a great singer inside you."
What's the difference between a bison and a buffalo?
You can't wash your face in a buffalo.
A student asked a teacher, "How do you pronounce this word? It's spelled A-L-L-I-E-D."
The teacher was about to answer, but then the student said, "Actually, I know how to pronounce it. I lied!" (allied)
What does a pregnant lady and pigs have in common?
They're both fat.
I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it! 😌
What do you call a racist community? America.
Yo momma so fat that she don't need a backpack. She keeps her things in her Lagrangian points.
A husband came back from a business trip and found out that his wife was pregnant. At first, he got a bit suspicious, but then he just ignored it and hugged his wife with happiness. The second when he met his friend and told him the news, the friend just said, "Wait, what? I thought she was on pills!"
Bully: "Shut up and give me your money, otherwise I will tell everyone that you are still a virgin."
Boy: "Haha, I am not a virgin anymore."
Bully: "Haha, nice joke."
Boy: "If you don't believe then ask your sister or brother."
Bully: "Hah, I don't have any sibling."
Boy: "Will just wait for 9 months then u will know."
My mum's a carrot.
Russian Santa Claus- You better watch out, You better not cry, cause if you do I will stab your fucking eye, Russian Santa Claus does not fuck around. He's making a list, He's checking it twice... You better leave out some Vodka with ice!
What's the best thing about dating a blind chick?
She can't identify you.
Stephen Hawking robbed the Apple store looking for a charger.
Stephen Hawking shows up to a car meet-up.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
Of a bad internet connection.
I was walking down Main Street when I saw a child.
I told him, "I will give you 20$ if you get my balls back from the vet."
He replied, "Why did they take your balls sir?"
"Beer plus going to the vet does not work well for everybody, especially when you're a furry."