Aed jokes
How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
Out of a catalogue. 😁
What do you get when you put 2 nuns and a blond on a football field? 2 tight ends and a wide receiver.
I want a series too, that will be SANS-tastic!
Sans: What am I using?
A trom-bone!
Why does Aaron eat burgers on a Wednesday? Because his spine is bent, and his favorite gun in Apex Legends is the G7 Scout, and he uses the speedy Spanish man.
Patient number 14 was diagnosed with stage 4 melanoma—a type of skin cancer. Pretty ironic how he travels. He went to terminal 14.
What do you call a cat with a live in doctor?
An anemic, shrivelled cat with desperate attached owners.
You're so fat, when someone calls you fat, you get depressed and cut you a slice of cake.
I made a joke about putting babies in the microwave and got told I was a disgusting person.
So from now on I’ll only make baby in the deep fryer jokes.
What do you call a criminal?
Disarmed and dangerous.
What's Jack's favorite flower? A rose.
I scanned an emo girl's arm the other day. Now I own her, only 3.99 with tax. That's a steal and a half, woopeeee!
Q: What's a ship's least favorite food? A: Iceburg-ers
"You are stupid. You can’t even ride a baby pony!"
A 17 year old pregnant Juanita flew all the way to NY from TX to get an abortion. Initially, she was denied the procedure because she wasn't COVID boosted, but after she explained the father was religious and wanted to be involved, they quickly resolved the threat.
What does Pikachu and an orphan have in common?
Pikachu, I choose you!
Why do people think Jesus is going to come back? He wasn’t nailed to a fucking boomerang!
It's been an hour since I crashed the tower.
How do you name a disabled Asian?
Throw the wheelchair down the stairs.
Little Johnny walked into an ice cream shop and asked: "Do you have chocolate filled ice cream?"
The man replies: "We are out of that, sorry, we are almost out of every single flavor, do you want me to get you a vanilla filled one?"
Johnny replies: "Sure."
After that, the man asks for Johnny's phone and goes to back of the store. 5 minutes later, the man comes with an ice cream and Johnny's phone.
Johnny asks: "How much for the ice cream?"
The man replies: "Nothing, it's on the house."
After Johnny ate his delicious ice cream, he searched for his watch history. And then Johnny realized the flavor of the ice cream.