Aed jokes
I went to see my doctor today and I asked him how come every time I have sex my eyes hurt.
He said that’s a common reaction to pepper spray.
Why can't a Muslim woman give head to an American cop?
She doesn't eat pigs.
"Monica Lewinsky has gone down on Bill Clinton several times. What's stopping her from having a one-night stand with Donald Trump?"
"Trump is nothing more than a little pussy, don't ya know?"
What’s the hardest part about being a PEDO?
Fitting in.
How do you know Adam and Eve were White?
Have you ever tried taking a rib from a Black man?
What’s the best part about fucking a dead bitch?
You don’t need consent.
What does the long distance call and a Black person have in common?
They both don’t work.
The first time riding my bike was a lot like my first time having sex.
It was hot. I was sweaty, but my sister had her hands on my shoulders all the time.
My lesbian neighbors gave me a Rolex. Guess they misunderstood when I said I wanted to watch.
What is the difference between a broom and a mop?
It’s hard to beat my girlfriend when she’s holding the mop.
Why do Republican men hate transgender people?
Because they lost a dick-measuring contest to a ladyboy in Thailand!
Bill Clinton and Joe Biden are on a sinking ship.
Joe Biden says we need to save the women and children. Bill Clinton says, "Screw the women and children." Joe Biden says, "Do we have that much time?"
Because of all the rampant inbreeding in America, it's not a surprise that Hollywood had to poach models, comedians, and actors from Canada and Australia.
Just because someone is white doesn't mean they are bad.
Sure, white Americans all treat Trump like a deity and are proud of their heritage of enslaving blacks.
But Canadians and Australians don't throw a hissy fit every time they see someone not white, and they don't think Europe is a country.
Why can’t you take a Black Asian guy golfing? Because he can’t drive and can’t find his own balls.
A Thai woman ran into a wall. What does she break?
Her boner.
What is the difference between a cow and 9/11?
You can’t milk a cow for 15 years.
I got a part in a movie called "Cocaine." I only have one line.
When your baby is stillborn and you have a funeral, what song should you never play?
Alphaville - "Forever Young."
What is the difference between Usain Bolt and Hitler?
Usain Bolt can finish a race.