Aed jokes
A man walks into a bar and orders 3 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What's got you down?"
The man says, "I just found out my niece is gay." The next day, he orders 4 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What's got you down now?" The man says, "I just found out my son is gay."
The next day, he orders 6 shots of whiskey. The bartender says, "Got anybody who likes women?" The man says, "My wife does."
Why do elephants paint their toes red, blue, green, orange, brown, and yellow?
So they can hide in a bag of M&Ms.
How many animals can you fit in a pair of underpants?
A. A cock and a few hairs (hares).
How do you help a constipated person?
You scare the shit out of them!
How do you catch a polar bear?
Cut a hole in the ice, put peas around it, when the polar bear goes to take a pea, you kick him in the ice hole.
My sister got mad when I told her to say this word 10 times, and she got in trouble, and it was a funny word that she did not even know what she was saying, ahhahaha! 😆 lol
What's a good way to masturbate?
Get somebody to do it for you.
What did the roti say to pratha?
You white like a white bastard.
What is a cup called when they show a ton of emotions?
Answer: Expresso! (KILL MEH)
I brought a new pen that can write underwater. It can also write other words.
Why did the guy like retarded jokes? Because he was a retard himself.
I live in a world made of cheese. Someone stubbed their toe and screamed, "Cheese-its, Christ!"
Two rabbits were racing. Neither could get ahead, so they ended in a hare-tie!
Vital information: if you find a stray dog in an alleyway, don't stare at its eyes.
Two girls have a sleepover.
Karen: Let's go to bed.
Lauren: Fine, but it's early.
*Karen wakes up and exits room*
*Lauren hears noise*
Mikey: You're so much better than my girlfriend, Karen.
Lauren: *laughs*
Lauren: *remembers her boyfriend is Karen's brother, Mikey*
I worked at a calendar factory, but I got the sack for taking a few days off!
What do you call a spice with a PHD?
Dr. Pepper
If I told you Jeremy Palacios was not GAY!
I'd be a liar.
What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
De-calf-inated.
He dead, he alive, but most importantly, he got a new hard drive.