Aed jokes
What is an orphan's favorite movie? Spider-Man: Homecoming.
Once Jimmy was minding his own business, then he hears his mom come home. He asked, "Where have you been?" She replied with, "I was at work," yet he knew his mom did not have work. So the next day, while heading to school, he gets a phone call saying his mom is pregnant, and they want to try their device, and they need the baby's dad to say if it's alright.
Please read all of it. I know it's long, please read all of it.
This dad heard his daughter praying. As she was praying, she came to an end: "Goodnight grandma, goodbye grandpa, goodnight daddy, goodnight mommy." The dad didn't think about the grandpa part and headed to bed. The next morning, the mom and dad heard that the grandpa died. The dad thought it was just coincidence, so he carried on with his day. At night, he heard his daughter again: "Goodbye grandma, goodnight daddy, goodnight mommy." After he heard "goodbye grandma," his facial expression changed, and he went straight to bed. The next morning, the grandma died out of nowhere. The dad began to worry and continued on with his day. At night, he heard his daughter again: "Goodbye daddy, goodnight mommy." The dad got scared, so he had a plan to go to work and stay hidden there. So that's what he did. When he got home the next day, his wife asked where he had been, and he replied back, "Sorry honey, I had a horrible day today." She replied back saying: "Oh, you think you had a bad day? The mailman just died on the front porch this morning!" If you get it, you get it.
Why is there a middle school?
Because the kids that go there are middle class families.
What do you call James Bond in a bathtub?
Bubble 007.
Are you my pantry? Because you look like a snack ;)
Guys, we shouldn't make jokes about 9/11. My dad was a victim.
He was the best pilot in Arab.
Me: I'm home, ma! Here's her with a new dad. Her: Go hang with someone. Me: Gets the noose, goes to fav tree. I love you, ma. 🙂
I farted, try me. You farted? Oh no, we all farted.
The plane crashed, but I did too on a pillow.
What do you call a lesbian alien? A "lesbeening."
What’s the difference between 69 and High School?
In 69 you usually only kiss one c*nt and look at one a**hole.
Yo mama so fat, when she said, "I want a boat," they gave her a naval ship.
What's an orphan's favorite movie? "Going Home."
"Gwen, this was a fake look in the comments!"
Why does an orphan always try to escape the orphanage?
Because he wants to get money to buy a family since they won't buy him.
Hey selfish king, I see you need a girlfriend ;)
Hello worstjokesever.com, I am not typing but instead using a microphone to speech, ding me a period.
I don’t see what’s coming up, but I don’t know why I am sending, so it will be random or funny or just stupid, LOL. So like and subscribe and...
What can a duck eat for a snack? Saltine quackers!
I would tell you a joke about my dink, but it's too long.
Two people are sitting in a skyscraper.
P1: Hey, what wifi are you connected to? The company wifi is horrible.
P2: Airplane wifi.