Action jokes
Everyone is able to be stupid, but you're just abusing the privilege.
I can explain Superman and Batman movies in one sentence.
Two orphans fighting in the rain.
What is something you can’t say in a superhero movie?
“Is it a bird, is it a plane, well whatever it is, it’s heading straight for the World Trade Center.”
Sometimes I look back at everything bad I have done. I tell myself it's ok, they're just telling me to keep myself safe :)
That's it, it wasn't a joke.
My depressed friend said he wanted to jump off of a bridge but he didn’t wanna commit suicide. I told him if you jump and yell "parkour," it’ll just be a failed stunt.
So if you say a bear shoots children, and Leah likes Mason Boswells, and I go to Benjamin Adlard year 6.
People ask me if my friend jumps off a bridge, will I go as well? Of course not. I am a leader; I will go first, my friend will jump after me!
They say they'll stay, but I left first.
I was at the bank yesterday.
A lady asked to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
Why is Kanye West's haircut actually years of work by many doctors to piece together skull fragments like a jigsaw puzzle?
Because Kanye once interrupted Chuck Norris on the set of "Walker Texas Ranger."
Why couldn’t people use the George Floyd action figure? Because it was vacuum sealed.
Gas, gas, gas, I'm gonna step on your ass!
TONIGHT
FOR FUN
YEAH YEAH YEAH
Just because you‘re suicidal, you don‘t have to be a quitter.
Wait, actually.
I threw a lamp at the depressed kid. I was just trying to brighten up his day.
"Fuck you, do something about it!"
I saw a kid in a wheelchair and I screamed, "EXTREME PARKOUR!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Imagine if the kid in a wheelchair was in Fast and Furious. His wheelchair is the only one that keeps him going.
What's an orphan's favorite movie? Spiderman: No Way Home.
Mom told me to get more in touch with my feminine side. So, I crashed the car.
Imagine orphans watching Spiderman: No Way Home.
I stood on the edge of a building and someone yelled, "Do a flip!"..... and I did.