Action jokes

What's the difference between a feminist and a suicide vest?

At least one does something when it is triggered.

This is mean af. Y'all need to stop this. Like, what the f *ck? What would happen if you all grew up and you were like this? Like, damn.

When I get naked in the shower, it gets turned on.

How to make time fly?

Answer: Throw a clock out of the window.

Chuck Norris can make 5 minute frosting in 4 minutes.

Chuck Norris doesn't turn on his shower, he just stares at it until it cries.

Q: How do you make a door cry?

A: Twist its knob.

Chuck does not cut butter with a knife, he cuts a knife with butter.

Chuck Norris doesn't zoom out; everything moves backwards.

I tried to catch air once... I mist.

Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect 4 in only three moves.

If Chuck Norris was a Spartan in the movie 300, the movie would be called 1.

When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat children into the fire.

Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 20 people, then it exploded.

Chuck Norris was a kamikaze pilot. 12 times.

What's the difference between a baby and a salad?

Most people don't get angry when you toss a salad.