There was an air crash of a Boeing 737-800 which can carry around 300 passengers.
It crashed in a cemetery.
They recovered 500 bodies.
Accident Jokes
I hit myself on a window yesterday. I really felt the pane.
Q: What is red, white, and blue and fun to watch?
A: A cop car rolling over after trying to catch someone for speeding.
What's got 6 legs, 3 arms, and 3 heads?
The finish line at the Boston marathon.
What do you get when you cross a highway on a bike?
Run over.
What was the last thing that went through Aiden's head before he died?
His elbow.
Did you hear about the man who ran in front of the bus? He got tired.
Where did Suzy go after getting lost on a minefield?
"Everywhere."
I'll never forget how my grandmother died. "This lemonade tastes like bleach..."
"Roses are red. Violets are red. My parents' bed is red. Oh shit, I set the house on fire!"
Looks like McSkillet McKilledIt.
What's yellow and can't swim?
A bus full of children.
What happened to the blind man's son?
He thought he was hitting a piñata.
Why did little Billy drop his ice cream?
He was hit by an ice cream truck.
What has 4 legs and 1 arm?
A Doberman in a playground.
What happened to the terrorist who tried to blow up a bus?
He burnt himself on the exhaust pipe.
"What happens when an Asian man runs into a brick wall?"
"A broken nose."
So, a woman gets into a car accident and is in the hospital, and the doctor goes on to tell the man what is going on.
Doctor: "So, your wife, she is paralyzed from the neck down."
And as the doctor goes on, he says all the things the man must do for her, like feed her, dress her, etc. Then the man says, "Why, WHY ME!"
Then the doctor leans over and whispers in the man's ear and says, "I'm just fuckin' with you, she's DEAD!"
Wanna hear some famous last words?
"We are just experiencing some turbulence."
Why is Ronan's forehead the size of Jupiter? Because he dropped the TV on his forehead. It also had rings.
Why is Jupiter's ring stuck in orbit? Because Ronan's forehead kept it stuck in orbit.
Snails are like sperm, slow and sloppy.
