Worst Jokes Ever
What’s a rapper’s favorite type of fishing?
Catching BIG BASS.
What do you call a rapper who can’t rhyme?
A speech impediment.
A guy is bankrupt, so he gives his son a duck and tells him to go sell it for as much as he can. So the kid goes on the street to sell the duck. A prostitute walks by and says, "I'll fuck you for $10." The boy says, “I would, but I don't have any money.” She says, “Ok, I'll take the duck instead.” He says ok, so they go upstairs and fuck.
The prostitute says, “That’s the best sex I've ever had. I'll give you the duck back and we can do it again.” So they do and he gets the duck back. But when they go downstairs, the duck gets hit by a car. And the guy that hit the duck feels so bad that he gives the kid $25. So when he gets home, his father asks him why he looks so tired. The boy says, well, I got a fuck for a duck, a duck for a fuck, and $25 for a fucked up fuck.
When and where was the biggest BBQ ever?
Hiroshima, Japan 1946.
People claim that Trump has Russian ties. That’s not true, just some crazy conspiracy theorists. All of Trump's ties are made in China.
What’s the difference between Mexicans and stoners?
Stoners have papers.
What is the difference between a black man and Jew?
One was born burnt.
What’s a priest's favorite sport?
Golf, because most of the holes are less than 18.
If we send more mosquitoes to Africa, we could save more mosquitoes from dying of AIDS.
What is the darkest month?
Black History Month.
What do you call a crowd of horny white women?
Cotton waiting to be picked.
I hooked up with my German girlfriend, but I kept on getting distracted when she kept yelling her age.
What is the worst thing about dating a blind woman?
Getting her husband's voice just right.
I asked the emo kid if he was depressed that his phone died before him.
What’s the difference between a fly and Lady Diana?
The sound when they hit the windshield.
What did God say when he made the first black man?
"Crap, I burnt one!"
What’s one thing women need to know nowadays?
Their place.
I just prevented an 11-year-old from getting assaulted.
I decided to go home.
I feel bad for the kids at Sandy Hook. All they wanted was books, but got magazines instead.
Why do people hit their electronics when they don’t work?
You keep the tradition of hitting black things.