Worst Jokes Ever
Why are mountains so funny? Because they're hill-arious! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, very funny!
We cut and kill flowers because they're pretty.
We cut and kill ourselves because we are not.
How long does it take to blow up a baby in the microwave?
I don't know, I close my eyes when I masturbate...
The sky never changes color, but when it does, we know how your breath is increasing.
Muslims love to exaggerate, that's why they always blow things up.
He told me that he was in a wheelchair, and I asked, "Oh, wheely?"
When is a car not a car? When it turns into a driveway. 🥁
When is a door not a door? When it's ajar.
A drunk man walked out of a bar and kept falling flat on his face. He wondered why this was until his wife spoke to him:
Wife: "Why is your face all bloody?"
Husband: "I was so drunk that I couldn't stand up, so I kept falling on my face!"
Wife: "Idiot. You left your wheelchair at the bar!"
Your life.
How do you make 7 an even number? Take the "s" out!
How do you cut ancient Rome in half?
With a pair of Caesars.
Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect 4 in only three moves.
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
What do you call the place where an octopus is sitting?
Octopied.
Confucius say, "man who go to sleep with itchy bum, wake up with smelly finger."
I don't always roll a joint, but when I do, it's my ankle.
Vagina jokes aren't funny.
Most of the time.
What do you call a guy whose hand is up a horse's butt?
An Amish Mechanic.
What did the guy exclaim after inventing the shovel?
It is ground breaking!