Worst Jokes Ever
Stop making autism jokes, calling us "retards". It is cool.
I went, I saw, I poop at hole. I make a portal.
My friend: Yo stupid.
Me: Is that right, and what exactly have you done in your lifetime that makes you Einstein?
My friend: *rolls eyes and says whatever.*
Me: Keep on rolling them, you might find your brain in there.
I named my dog Chicken.
I love eating chicken.
What was Helen Keller's favorite color?
Velcro.
Sign on my attorney's office wall: "You can't have manslaughter without laughter."
I bought my spoiled brother a trampoline for his birthday, but he decided to sit in his wheelchair like a little bitch.
hg is cool.
"Grandma, tell me a story!" I said as we huddled near the campfire.
"Alright," she said, "Once, there was a tree named Timmy, he was my best tree friend. I used to read books under him and climb all his branches."
"Where is Timmy now?" I asked.
Grandma pointed to the campfire.
What's so wrong about Trump being in office?
He steals all the cats.
Ask me who Joe is.
Who is Joe?
JOE MAMA!
I was going to tell you a joke about a big cat, but I would be lion.
What do you call purple when it's being mean? Violent.
Do you want to hear a joke about the blunt pencil? Never mind, it's pointless.
Aaron, you glad I didn't make this joke?
My mom
What’s the difference between a cat and a dog?
It’s easier to throw a cat against the wall.
A friend of mine just got divorced. He and his ex-wife split the house. He got the outside.
I didn't put my kids up for adoption.
Why is the iPhone X the perfect phone for an orphan?
Because there is no home button.