Worst Jokes Ever
There is nothing funnier than my life. (Evan 2020)
For some reason, quarks sound really strange to me.
Q: What do the St. Louis Rams and Billy Graham have in common?
A: They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell, “Jesus Christ.”
An orphan made an Instagram. He did not know what that symbol was on the bottom left hand corner.
When I went to the doctor, he pulled his wife in and said, "What do you see?"
I replied, "A fat bitch." He said, "Ok, your eyesight is perfect."
The one by die.
Why did the orange go blind? Because he was low on vitamin C.
dvbmmnxc mhgdc gfdfngt.
What is the one sauce Germans avoid on their steak?
"Ajous".
"Did you go to the light show?"
"Yeah, it was lit."
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
What is a homeless person's favorite joke?... Themselves.
How did the orphan survive birth?
U
Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?
Poooooooooooooooooooooop!
This man walks into a bar and says, "How do I get service here?"
The assistant bar attendant tells him to take a seat as the bartender will be there to serve him shortly. After 2 minutes, the man says this is ridiculous, that he has to wait. The assistant then offers him a bar snack of free nuts, which the man duly eats. Another 2 minutes go by, and the man then says, "OK, I get it, no service of beer, but free nuts," to which the assistant says, "Hell no, the game starts in 10 minutes." Everyone laughs and claps.
For an orphan, any bag of chips is family size.
Chode.
I hate rubber.
What does it sound like when a dragon sings? A fire alarm.