Worst Jokes Ever
What happens when animals do a squat?
It doesn't become pretty...
What's the difference between the Barracuda car and a fish?
The fish can't go fast.
What's the difference between crazy people and regular people?
We don't live in their heads.
What's a crazy man's favorite phrase when he has a knife?
"Freak out!"
What's a bison's favorite gun?
A PP Bizon.
When someone says "Did I ask?" say "Then why did you respond?"
Why are supercars so super? Because it is superfast, lol.
I was dying when I called my sister and she said, "Hi, this is Pepperoni's pizza and abortion clinic; your loss, our sauce. How may I help you today?"
Why can't orphans have sex?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Why did Kristen Stewart fart on the set of Charlie's Angels? Because she ate too much damn chili for breakfast I made for her. I just forgot to put my foot in it.
You know why Elmer Fudd always came out hunting rabbits in the woods? Because Bugs Bunny would not stop flirting with his girlfriend.
Are you having rabbit and duck for dinner?
Yeah.
Why?
Because I got too obsessed with hares.
I tried making vegetable soup yesterday, but I couldn’t fit the wheelchair in the pot.
Why did Bella Thorne pass gas on "Shake It Up Chicago?" Because I gave her too split pea soup for breakfast.
The other day all those toilet papers came by my house and asked do I have any crack candy. Naw, I don't have no damn crack candy or no crack apples. All I have here in the backyard is a peanut butter crack sandwich. Help yourself, and while you're at it, clean up all the damn doggie dodo that's everywhere. Thank you, Mr. Toilet Papers.
What's the difference between a high street betting firm and a prostitute?
You can get on with a prostitute!
Yo mama is so fat, she couldn't even fit through the rabbit hole at first because she ate like a damn pig last night when we had dinner.
Sneed feed seed.
Formerly Chuck's!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't have a home.
I would have loved to ride the Titanic at least once ;)
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