Worst Jokes Ever
My grandad broke his legs.
To cheer him up, I bought him a Walkman.
A man walked into a bar...
Ouch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Two bald dudes were pulling each other's hair.
Are you depression? 'Cause you're always on my mind~
A Texan and an Alaskan walk in a room. The Alaskan says, "My state is bigger than yours." The Texan says, "It won't be when it melts!"
Afghanistan.
What kind of clothing should you wear on “hump day”? Camelflouge.
Teacher: I used to be an orphan once.
Student: OOFT.
Teacher: Who are we missing?
Student: Your parents.
What is better than hitting a booty? Playing with the titties.
What does "bitch" mean?
Son asked father, father said it means "you're handsome." Son said, "OK, you're a bitch." Father: "Of course not, I'm not a bitch!"
Wife: "Hi honey, I'm pregnant."
Husband: "Hi pregnant, I'm dad."
Wife: "No, you're not...."
I have a really good construction joke.
But I'm still working on it.
My boyfriend thinks he’s hilarious.
Him: How do you break things?
Me: You break things up.
Him: Okay.
Me: Is everything okay?
Him: We’re a twig. We’re breaking up.
When a hedgehog finds poop, they put it in their mouths. They mix it with saliva until it's a foam, then rub it on themselves.
How to get your woman to come upstairs? Say you are naked.
What does a serial killer make for breakfast?
Scrambled legs and toes.
Why can orphans not go on field trips? They need a parent signature.
"Fish, why you no fly?"
"I don't like being caught naked."
Which country makes me crack the fuck up?
LAUGHghanistan.
What do you call Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan.