Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

What do you call an orphan? Homeless.

What's an orphan's worst favorite movie? Home Alone.

Why can't homeless people find a home? Because they're orphans.

Who is Joe?

You reply back: Who is Candice?

They reply back: Who is Candice?

You say: "Candice nuts fit into Joe Mama's mouth."

My sister: See you at home in about an hour.

Me: Okay.

My sister: Sister, where are you? *She looks out the window.*

Me: Sis, I'm here, can't you see me?

Sister: OMG, she's dead!

Me: Yeah, I know, but can't you see me?

What did the swearing hen say?

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK!" (It's cluck.)

What did the cussing rooster say?

"Cock-a-doodle-doo, phew!"

My girlfriend was cheating in Uno.

She's not the only one who can play that game.

One day you see a girl climb a pole and ask her, "Why are you climbing that pole?" "Because a boy paid me to." "He did that to see your underwear." "Oh. Ok."

The next day you see her do the same thing. "Why are you doing the same thing?" "Well, I got him this time. I did not wear underwear."

What's the difference between a guy and a woman? They fall from different heights.

When you get to feel a dick in you, then suck bro, all your stress [goes] out the window.

One day I got home and told my girlfriend, "I cheated on you." She replied with, "F**k you!" I then said, "But you won't, that's why I cheated on you."

  • 1

    • Brendon, just shut up, no one was talking to you on the fucking joke! And my sis is not a female dog. If she was, then how the hell would she spell!

    I was listening to WAP in my car with my four-year-old cousin, and she asked why they don't fix the holes in the house.

    Then my fucking boyfriend, what a hoe, was.