What's the difference between a magician and a chorus line?
The magician has a cunning array of stunts!
Worst Jokes Ever
What's the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?
A rooster clucks defiance!
My dad died in 9/11.
But he was the pilot.
It's snot fair!
Why don't the giraffes go to elementary school? Because they are already in high school.
How do bees get to school?
They go on a school buzz.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Abby.
Abby who?
Abby C D E F G!
What do elves study in school?
The elf-abet.
Why did the music teacher need a ladder to reach the really high notes?
What did the pen say to the pencil? You have a point.
What does an orphan do on school parents' day? Nothing.
Why did the cucumber go to the doctor? Because he wasn't peeling well!
Who is the coolest vegetable?
Rad-ish, of course!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Lettuce in.
Lettuce in who?
Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo? Head 'n Shoulders.
Why can’t orphans win trophies?
Because they can’t take them home.
The only people who do yo mama jokes wish they had a mom.
You're fat. Don't sugar coat it because you would probably eat that, too.
I hate my wife.
*cue laugh*
Ur Granny, tranny.
Ur Dad, lesbian.
Ur Mom, gay.