I saw this really old guy with the Hitler stache, so I decided to start beating him up.
It was very weird when a camera crew came out with Harrison Ford and started yelling at me.
Worst Jokes Ever
What does a cannibal call a pregnant person?
A Kinder Surprise.
What do you call a cow that's beating his meat? Beef stroganoff!
A suicide bomber's biggest fear is dying alone.
Why doesn't China have a cricket team?
They always eat the bat.
Boomer.
What’s the difference between my lawn and my wrists?
Nothing, I cut both of them.
Other girls be like, "I want a 6ft guy", meanwhile I want to be 6ft under. 😃👍
Suicide is never the answer.
Suicide is the question.
The answer is yes.
Me: Now I know why Michael Jackson turned white.
The police: You finally figured it out.
In a proud, boastful voice, Gemma told the old Chinese woman who was babysitting her that onions were the only food that could make you cry. The woman nodded and said that was true enough.
They continued eating for a while. "This is really good!" the little girl exclaimed. "What's this meat?"
The old lady replied with: "Well, there was a brown dog in your yard that wouldn't stop yapping."
What's the difference between an onion and a hooker?
I cry when I chop up onions.
What do incest families do on Halloween?
Pumpkin.
The only time rape jokes are funny is never.
Rape jokes aren’t funny. People like me that are actually victims of rape are triggered by them.
What 3 words started Jeffery Dahmer's cannibalism?
"This isn't ketchup."
"White people can't jump"...
"You must not have seen the twin towers on 9/11."
If you're American outside the restroom, what are you in the restroom?
European.
What are you on your way to the bathroom?
Russian.
A woman is in the hospital giving birth. The doctor comes up to her afterwards.
Dr: "I'm sorry, I have good news and bad news."
Woman: "What's the bad news?"
Dr: "Your baby is Ginger!"
Woman: "Ok, so what's the good news?"
Dr: "It's dead!"
How many black people does it take to start a protest? -1.
