Worst Jokes Ever
If you see a woman get raped, don't bother helping. After all, they are independent and need no man.
Cheer on the rapist if you want.
What did Michael Jackson say to the kid on his lap? "Just beat it, just beat it."
An apple a day keeps the doctor away...
Or at least it does if you throw it hard enough.... 🥵🤣
My wife left a note on the fridge that said, "This isn't working." I'm not sure what she's talking about. I opened the fridge door and it's working fine! Lol.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Bikini.
Bikini who?
Oh, that was just a bikini.
Why cant asian parents have a white child? Cuz 2 wongs dont make a white
My mother caught me jerking off and she told me to leave it out. I didn't know what she was doing but she grabbed my cock and started sucking. Then I found out on porn she was doing deep throat.
A couple of weeks later my dad caught me jerking off, I thought he would deep throat, but he just walked up to me and slapped my boner. I cried for 5 hours. Luckily my mum gave me a sloppy joe afterwards.
How did the villagers identify the masked rapist?
He was the only one in the village who believed the victim.
My hemorrhoids are so bad, I’ve had toilet bowls that looked like abortions.
I was working in an iPhone store in Norwich when a man came! He said, "Give me a hat-trick or I will destroy your store!" I said, "No," and he started to smash phones! I immediately screamed, "Important game!" and he disappeared! Shame on you, Penaldo, for ruining my store! 😡😡
A woman was 3 months pregnant when she fell into a coma. After 6 months, she woke up. She asked the doctor, "How's the baby?"
"You had twins," the doctor replied. "Your brother named them."
The woman said, "Oh no, not my brother! What did he call them?"
The doctor said, "He called the girl Denise."
"What about the boy?" the woman asked.
The doctor said, "Denephew."
Why do New Zealanders have sex with sheep on the edge of cliffs? They push back harder.
An Eskimo was holidaying in New Zealand and while driving his rented car around the countryside it broke down. A bloke passing by offered to help, lifted the bonnet and said, "I know your problem, you blew a seal."
The Eskimo with a shocked expression retorted, "Yeah? Well you fuck sheep!"
I told my girlfriend that the world is flat.
She said, "but the world is round."
I said, babe, you are my world.
Got the George Floyd pack, this shit makin' it hard to breathe.
20 likes by just cheese.
I broke up with my girlfriend, so I stole her wheelchair, and guess who came crawling back.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Little Johnny is smokin' hard, The sun looks like Mountain Dew.
Master has given Dobby a Glock. Dobby is Thug.
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into the school fire and said, "Hot wheels."