Worst Jokes Ever
I got something long stuck inside me last night, dammit, that needle hurt.
What's braver than coming out gay? Taking a shit in an elementary school bathroom with those two kids that always mess with you and turn off the lights.
I pushed my best friend's chair in class. Now I kinda feel bad that he was in a wheelchair.
My jokes are like your dad, you only see them for a few days.
5 Cobra Kai Facts:
1: Johnny = Daniel
2: Miguel > Robby
3: Miyagi Do = Eagle Fang
4: Chozen and Daniel > Kreese and Silver
5: Tory is actually a good person.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What do you call a dog with no legs? No point in calling, he won't come anyway :(
Reminder: Check the fridge, but remember nothing's in there.
This is how to die soft 101.
Yo bro, you good? You need a hug?
You're all gay. HEHEHE!
Does it make me gay if I kiss your dad and he decides to drill my ass?
Why do orphans eat cereal with water? Because their dad never came home with the milk.
My wife is a whore, so I pimped her out and broke her mentally and emotionally, taught her a good lesson of being a real woman loyal to her man. End of story, you women are bitches.
What do you call people who jumped in the dam?
A dam fool.
What does an iPhone have that orphans do not?
Home buttons.
The emo kid tried to give me a handshake. Sadly, I left him hanging.
An orphan goes to a family restaurant with her doll.
"I'm sorry but you can't be here," said the man. "This is a family restaurant." The orphan said, "This is my family," then pointed to her doll.
Bick: Jesus isn't real.
Ron: Yes, He is.
Bick: Prove it, bitch.
Ron: Cussing is a sin. Open the curtains.
Bick: Wh-?
Ron: JUST DO IT, DAMMIT!
The sunlight shone through the window, landing on Ron and Bick. Both of them died and went to hell.
Ron: Fuck you, Jesus.
Bick: Told you Jesus was real.
Satan: Get to work, slaves.
Moral of the story: Stay off the marijuana.
When an orphan takes a selfie, it's a family photo.
Why can orphans travel so much?
They don't get homesick.
Bob: Can I come to your house to meet your family?
Orphan: I don't have a family.