Yo mama's so poor, she can't even afford to pay attention.
Worst Jokes Ever
Don't you find it ironic that Kobe Bryant bounced his helicopter off the ground like a basketball?
My wife said, "Why oh why have you ordered carpet, our house is lovely?"
Thankfully the carpet was put to good use in the end, no more stupid comments coming from a rolled up Emily in the bottom of the ocean!
My wife saw me hit the best drive yesterday with my golf clubs.
I must have drove that chihuahua 300 yards.
What has 15 arms, 9 legs, 8 heads, and 12 eyeballs?
A mosque after a missile strike.
Why shouldn't you say "I hate you" to your parents?
Ask an orphan.
A shark can swim faster than me, but I can run faster than a shark.
So in a triathlon, it would all come down to whoever can ride a bike the fastest.
Your forehead's so big, when you were being born, the doctors thought you had no face.
What's an orphan's least favorite joke?
Yo mama!
If I don't get a bf by the end of this month, Christmas lights won't be the only thing hanging from the roof.
A teacher walked up to me and said, "How did we get butt cracks?"
I was like 4, so I said, "You had an earthquake on your booty."
Bootylicious lol
A butt saw the toilet and said, "Shit, I'm sick!"
What's brown and sticky?
A stick. Get your head out of the gutters... Jeez!
Why would a Italian heterosexual male do for $100.00 if he was a prostitute that a polish american male would only do for a Klondike bar if he was a prostitute?
suck a big cock.
Jantje goes on a walk with his grandmother. Jantje sees 1 dollar on the street and picks it up.
The grandmother says: "Hey, Jantje! No picking up things from the floor! They are ugly and bad!"
Then they keep walking. The grandmother slips and asks Jantje to help her stand up. Jantje answers: "No! Everything on the ground is ugly and bad."
Me: You know your parents were very good people.
Orphan: Wow, I didn’t know that.
Me: I know, you're an orphan.
I said to the orphan, "Do you want me to take you to your family? Oh wait..."
Why can't orphans get five stars in GTA?
Because they're not wanted.
What do you call an orphan's family picture? A self-portrait.
Once my sister was a sister, now she's a blister.
