Worst Jokes Ever

I was at school today, and one of my friends said after a test, "Man, that was hard." After that, I started laughing and I said, "That's what she said."

Why did Dad say no to the pool? Because he can't swim.

Why did the chicken cross the road to KFC?

He wanted to see a chicken strip.

"Texas be like it's cold over here over here."

Your mom's so fat, she annexed Crimea!

Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick her candy, but Jack was in shock with a mouth full of cock, 'cause Jill's real name was Randy.

At the age of 100, you get a letter from the Queen. At 12, you get a DM from Prince Charles.

Why do emos hang themselves? Because no one wants to hang around them.

The "f" in orphan stands for family.

Except there is no "f."

Texas be like, "We vote to freeze ourselves!"

Texas be like everything is bigger here: guns and winter storms!

RYAN MY BELOVED SON WHERE ARE YOU?

What do you call an elite bungee jumper? An emo kid.

"Trust falling" with a bridge is more trustworthy than me.

Dad: I'll pay you 10 bucks for every day you don't tell a lie.

Next day:

Dad: Son, what's the ugliest thing you've ever seen?

Son: That ugly face of yours, go get a life, gosh, Dad, you're embarrassing.

The dad sulked for 3 whole years.

Proof that words really can hurt.

Fake emo: when I’m sad, I cut myself.

Real emo: same.

Fake emo: another piece of cake.

Why did NASA have to go to space? Because space is lonely.

What is the opposite of a lady finger?

Answer: Mentos.

What's the difference between a coat hanger and an emo?

Nothing, they both hang.

Women be like if men are gone, Earth would be a better place, (forgetting) women help to create war, weapons, animal and human cruelty, and have helped to enforce laws that oppress them.