Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

My grandma just died from cancer.

My last words to her were “I like your cut, G.”

Russia and Ukraine are running a marathon. Who do you think won? Russia did. Russia gave Ukraine a migraine.

Why were 9/11 victims so mad?

They ordered three pepperoni pizzas, not two planes!

A guy walks into a restaurant and orders turtle soup. The waiter hollers, "One turtle soup!"

A moment later, the guy calls the waiter over and says, "I’ve changed my mind, I would like pea soup." The waiter hollers, "Hold the turtle, and make it pea!"

I KNOW IT'S MARCH, BUT I THOUGHT OF THIS!

Jingle bells, jingle bells! OH GOD, SANTA FELL!

I guess it's time for Mrs. Claus to go straight down to hell!

My fitness guru said that if I got raped, it would help me in future marathons.

Me, an orphan: *laughing at orphan jokes*

Some person: Stop laughing, it's sad to laugh at your pain.

Me, an orphan: That's the funny part, what am I going to do, tell my parents?

What's the difference between a wanted person and a wanted handicapped person? The handicapped person wasn’t last seen on foot.