My dad had a very unfortunate accident with his death. I clearly asked for Jammy Dodgers and got Bourbons!
Worst Jokes Ever
What is saw and bleeding and covered in bruises?
Your mum.
Therapist: What do you want to do when you grow up?
Me: Oh, I wan-
Therapist: Don’t say to be dead.
Me: Well, I want to be an entrepreneur. I want to sell land, pencils, oh yeah. I also want to sell farm.
My friend asked me once, "Is there any religion in the world that preaches a god who masturbates in a closed room?"
"Islam it is."
Why can’t orphans fly? Because they’re still winging it.
Yo mama is so fat that when she jumps, the earth was shaking!
As a kid, I used to eat a sour herb from a certain spot near a rock.
Now I pee on it, just following the ritual of Africa.
Bully: I bet your dick is so small when you look down you can't see it.
Guy: I don't, I see your mom.
A little girl said to her mom, "Mom, my butt's cracked, kiss it, kiss it!" Her mom said, "Sweetie, shut up, it's always been there!" Then her daughter died 'cause of her melodramaticness.
What did one squirrel say to the other squirrel?
"Stop staring at my nuts."
Ha, orphans are soooooo funny. I mean, they have many family stories. Oh wait...
A handicapped person and an orphan get into a fight. The orphan says, "At least I have two functional legs." The handicapped person says, "At least I have two functional parents."
Why can’t an orphan take medicine?
They need parental supervision.
Yo Mama so stupid that when she saw a sign that said, “Airport Left,” she turned around and went home.
Post your jokes in the comments below!
A girl asked her mom, "Why is my name Walmart?"
Her dad replied and said, "Because that’s where you were made."
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
IBC.
IBC who?
I'll be seeing you later.
How are orphans like Spider-Man?
No way home.
Your mom is so ugly her face would split in half when she sees you.
Say this to someone who is fat that you don't like (make sure he's a virgin):
"You're so fat you can sell shaaade!! That's why you're a virgin and you masturbaaate!!! Yeah, I've see you, touching your 1 centimetre and if you have a gf she's is a cheater!!"
Make sure to say "shaaade" not "shade". And say "maturbaaate" (also try to say a D not a T in maturbaaate) not "masturbate".
