Worst Jokes Ever
How do planets have a baby?
They have spasex.
I caught my wife this morning gazing at our marriage license of long ago that hangs upon our wall with tears in her eye!
Almost got teary eyed myself until she told me she was only looking for the expiration date!
Global warming will kill every single person on this planet.
It's a good thing I'm married.
Your mum's foreheads.
What's the difference between an orphan and a flower?
The flowers actually get picked.
An orphan thinks he finally sees his mom, but then he realizes it's air.
what did the suicidal kid say to the tree?
don't leave me hanging.
That awkward moment when you thought the guy was a pretty good magician, and only then realize he simply suffers from leprosy.
Titanic: And I’m nominating all passengers for the Ice Bucket Challenge!
Q: What do you call two nuns watching television?
A: Not very interesting.
Why were the Twin Towers mad? Because when they spawned in a Minecraft world, all they got was plains.
A kid calls out for his mom one day while he is in the tub and says, "Mom come quick! I'm walking on water!"
And the mom runs in and says, "I knew evon whatent yo daddy! I ain't never slept with him a day my life!"
Why don’t orphans play baseball?
'Cause they can’t hit a home run.
My mom said, "Hey, come over here."
I responded, "Too late, Mom!"
"Batteries, batteries, who the batteries in your remotes and everything else you got in your house is turned upside down?"
Your mama is so fat that she took a picture at Christmas, and it's still downloading.
Why aren't emos and trees friends? Because the tree leaves them hanging.
My doctor gave me one year to live, so I shot him. The judge gave me 15. Problem solved!
Why did the emo kid hate the tree?
It left him hanging.
Why do orphans like water?
Cuz they drink it ;)