Worst Jokes Ever
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they didn’t have a home.
Why do candles like birthdays?
Because they can get lit!
How do emos propose?
"Would you like to join my family tree?"
My dog once went to Uranus. 🐶🤣🤣🤣
You know, because dogs sniff Uranus? 😂😂😂
I love you all the way to Uranus! 🤣
Helen Keller.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they have no home to run to!
What is a monkey with a head?
You know why the Twin Towers were more remembered? A hexagon is more commendable than a pentagon.
What's the difference between China and New York City?
In China, the Asians ride ON the trains. In New York City, they usually end up riding UNDER them.
What's the difference between a dead baby in my trash can and a discarded sex toy?
...
I'm still trying to think of an answer.
What's the difference between kinky and perverted? Kinky is when you tickle your girlfriend with a feather, perverted is when you use the whole bird.
Who needs April 1st if your whole life is already a lie?
Me to an orphan: If you had a penny for everyone who loved you, I don't think you'd have any.
The orphan: But why?
Me: Because if someone loved you, they wouldn't have thrown you out.
What do you call a flat emo girl?
A cutting board.
How do you call an autistic kid with a pistol?
Special forces.
Why did Helen Keller’s dog run away?
You’d run away too if your name was afjlkawihrs gdfn wjasidphbfvnas icxhuvbjsdlk m.nd;fuoxcghkfjckoSZ: lF,.XMAVUDOXICUGJNWLFXCMV CKLSAXHV IJADHXC;IVKSA.
"I bet you can't tell me something that will make me both happy and sad at the same time," a husband says to his wife. She thinks about it for a moment and then responds, "Your penis is bigger than your brother's."
Yo mama so fat, everyday people kept asking: "Are you pregnant?"
What do you call a gay drive up?
A fruit roll-up.