Worst Jokes Ever
Is your dad a magician?
Because he magically disappeared.
"I’m going through a lot of things right now," I said frustratedly to the person on the line as I crashed straight through the next building in my car.
What do you call a whale on a beach?
Banked.
What was the last hat Princess Diana wore?
A bonnet.
How do you help a starving cannibal?
You give him a hand!
Did you hear about the cannibal who converted to Catholicism?
On Fridays, he only eats fishermen!
Little Johnny is gay.
What do emos do when they meet up?
They hang out.
I awoke after being raped and was shocked to find my fingers were broken. It was hard to grasp.
What do you call a potato with a pp?
A dictator.
What do Emos say when they trick-or-treat?
"Boo-hoo!"
Last last, now everybody go chop breakfast.
My teacher says no phones allowed. I say my phone is allowed because I’m nobody, Dania.
Deals is bully, right? Denise, like a bully type of rock, is a piggy.
I saw my sister sucking a big toe.
So you decide one day to ask your son if he wants to f**k, do you do it for 3 hours, then you realize how will I explain another pregnancy to my sterile husband?
What is the sweat between Dolly Parton's boobs?
Mountain Dew.
What's the best part of being an orphan?
All the chips and candy bars are family sized.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree? The apples get picked.
I am the ice cream man running over fat kids with my van. If you touch my van, I’ll smack you in the face with a frying pan. If you steal ice cream, I’ll shoot you in the face with a fudge machine.