Worst Jokes Ever
Whoever invented religions, they fucked up.
We got all kinds of retarded adults believing in mythologies.
What's the difference between a God and my mom?
My mom exists. I mean... she did at one point! Unlike any "Gods."
Girl: Dad, where are you?
Dad: I went to go get milk.
Girl: But we have milk.
Dad: I know, I just don't love you.
What are the four letters you don’t want to hear from a dentist?
I C D K
I can make a word with those: "DICK".
When did Jesus die?
On Luan Day hahahahahahahahahahahahaha LOUD HOUSE wink wink.
What happens if a boy bumps into a dog?
It’s a bumper team.
Ashton Parkes.
- I work with animals.
- Great! What job?
- A butcher.
I saw a kid in a wheelchair, and he was getting bullied. I said, "Stand up for yourself!"
Smile, because it confuses people. Smile, because it’s easier than explaining what is killing you inside.
What did Grant say? "I'm gay."
Me: I'm afraid of random letters.
Therapist: You are?
Me: [screams]
Therapist: Oh, I see.
Me: [screaming intensifies]
Jesus got rejected. A few years later, he died. He came back just to lose his virginity because even Jesus is not a fucking cunt.
It's too long, sorry. >:)
Why does Batman only wear black?
Because he's emo!
What do you call a dipshit?
A Charlie.
What is an orphan's family tree? A stump.
What is an orphan's least liked meal? Family dinner.
Dad: Honey!
Mom: What?
Dad: All of the broken condoms are on the bed.
Mom: WHAT!?
Children: *staring*
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Smell mop.
Smell mop who?