Worst Jokes Ever
A guy and his girl just finished making love.
Just as they lay next to each other, the girl asks, "Have you thought about any baby names?"
The guy then takes his condom off and ties it, and says, "Well, probably David Copperfield, if he gets out of this!"
Why can’t orphans play baseball? Because they can’t find home.
If you are what you eat, then I’m black.
No, no, no, I am cool.
Tell an orphan "your mom", but then remember he doesn't have one.
What's better than having unprotected sex? Getting an abortion.
It isn't rap music if it isn't about rape.
Yo mama's so fat, her belly button gets home 15 minutes before she does.
What was the first thing Thanos snapped?
Loki’s neck.
What is the similarity between an orphan and the new Spider-Man movie, "There's No Way Home"?
Me: How do you celebrate Christmas?
Orphan: I don't know what you mean.
Me: There is no one to give a present.
Which train is loaded with bubble gum?
A chew-chew train.
Hey guys, it's Hailey here.
I'ma start off with henlo ;-;
I know you guys aren't going to believe me because of the assholes who were faking to be me, but if you can try to believe me, I'll explain.
So, Jake, we can't really be together anymore, since we no longer can chat. I'm so sorry.
Basically, my parents caught us on here as you realized. Yayyyy.
I don't have time to say anything else. So I've gotta go, but thankyou guys for everything you did for me.
Also, you won't get any response from me so yea. So sorry guys ;-;
What do you call a wheelchair on fire?
Hot wheels.
How do you kidnap Stephen Hawking?
Shut off his computer.
What does Stephen Hawking put his food in? A microwave.
What do you call an emo who's emo?
An emo.
At a party, a young wife admonished her husband, "That's the fourth time you've gone back for ice cream and cake. Doesn't it embarrass you?"
"Why should it?" answered her spouse. "I keep telling them it's for you."
Why don’t pirates take a shower before they walk the plank?
They just wash up on shore.
"Your mother has been with us for 20 years," said John. "Isn’t it time she got a place of her own?"
"My mother?" replied Helen. "I thought she was your mother."