Worst Jokes Ever

Trees are just bushes with lift kits.

I asked a person in a wheelchair if they wanted to fight. All I had to do is say, "Stand up!"

What does an orphan and a military man not have in common? Neither gets to go back home.

One time my dad was an orphan, so I questioned where he learned to parent.

My dad told me a joke one time. When I realized the joke, the second tower was hit.

How do you make a dishwasher work again?

Smack her ass and say "get back to work!"

Playing soccer in a wheelchair is basically Rocket League in real life.

I had sex with a disabled girl. You can say I handiclapped those cheeks.

Why do orphans always have the newest iPhone?

Because it doesn’t have a home button.

What do you call a disabled orphan?

A left over vegetables.

What's the difference between me and my mate...

I left my dad, while hers left with their friend Cancer.

Why do orphans cause trouble at school?

So the teachers will call their parents.

Slavery is like Pokémon, you gotta catch them all.

An Aboriginal Australian told me that I was on his farmland.

So I told him he was on my cock.

(I'm Australian btw, respect to my American bros🇺🇸)

A girl called me ugly.

So I drove over her with a car and called her flat.

What do you call a disabled kid's sweat?

VEGETABLE OIL!

I’ve been munching away on these new Tic Tacs recently and honestly, they are really good.

It’s a little strange how they came in a bottle labeled “Ibuprofen” though, and really, I’m starting to feel a little sick. The bottle’s almost empty though, so it’s time to get some more!

A disabled kid kept throwing up in class.

So I threw him out the window!

I love all races, even the bad ones.

Q. What's the difference between Trump and a Teletubby?

A. The Teletubby is a lot more coherent.