9 jokes

Song

Woozy Wisents · 8 days ago

1, 2, Freddy's coming for you.

3, 4, better lock your door.

5, 6, grab a crucifix.

7, 8, stay up late.

9, 10, never sleep again.

I love this song, y'all! Like if you love it too! :)

Rape

Anonymous · 2 years ago

Rape, 9/11, abortion, orphan, murder, dead, kill, drugs.

Am I funny now? Because this is what you brainlets find funny.

Terrorist

Chesmond · 7 years ago

A child was walking through the forest when a wolf jumped in front of him. The child saw that the wolf had no leg. He then became a terrorist and caused 9/11.

Pedo

Sarai Castle · 6 years ago

I was listening to my children praying, and my youngest that can speak said to me: "Mama, why is Gramma dead?"

I smiled and told her, "Well, less than 10 years ago when I was 5, your age, my Momma took me into the basement with some hot rando during a party. And 9 months later Shinana was born. One Pedo after another and your 4 siblings were born. The Pedo I met last night told me, 'If your mother's the one making you do this, do what you do best.' I listened and the next day she didn't leave her bed breathing. When the Pedo found out he left me and your soon to be brother."

She replies with, "Make his child support expensive!" Now he has to pay me 2,000 U.S. dollars every month, like the other ones that ran away.

9/11

Anonymous · 4 years ago

9/11 was pretty great to me, it's just hilarious to watch people lose at Jenga.

Gordon Ramsay

10InchesDeepIntoYourMother 🔛🔝 🔥🔥🔥 · 2 years ago

A meme with a pink background and an image of Gordon Ramsay's face in the top right corner. The text on the image says, "build a gordon ramsay insult". The meme has three columns under the "this is you" format to build an insult, the columns are organized by digit of birth date or like.

9 memes

9/11

United kingdom · 3 years ago

9/11 is like me after I'm finished with my Lego house. I destroy it! 😄🤣

9/11

SlipknotFan1103 · 8 years ago

"9/11 was just a really intense game of Jenga."

Number

oink · 8 years ago

Why is 6 scared of 7?

Because 7 8 9.

Time

Depresso_Espresso · 3 years ago

Wanna know something funny? Well, there was this one time when my parents were talking about their marriage.

Then after the wedding, they decided to make a joke, and then 9 months later, I was born. My birthday (4/1/06) April 1, 2006.

Son

Shower thoughts · 2 years ago

A housewife takes a lover during the day, while her husband is at work, not aware that her 9-year-old son was hiding in the closet. Her husband came home unexpectedly, so she hid her lover in the closet. The boy now has company.

Boy: "Dark in here." Man: "Yes, it is." Boy: "I have a baseball." Man: "That's nice." Boy: "Want to buy it?" Man: "No, thanks." Boy: "That's my dad outside." Man: "How much did you say the baseball was again?" Boy: "$250."

In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the mom's lover are in the closet together.

Boy: "Dark in here." Man: "Yes, it is." Boy: "I have a baseball glove." Man: "That's nice." Boy: "Want to buy it?" Man: "No, thanks." Boy: "I think I just remembered something I needed to tell my dad." Man: "How much did you say the glove was again?" Boy: "$750." Man: "Fine."

A few days later, the father says to the boy, "Grab your glove. Let's go outside and toss the baseball!" The boy says, "I can't. I sold them." The father asks, "How much did you sell them for?" The son says, "$1,000." The father says, "It's terrible to overcharge your friends like that. That is way more than those two things cost. I'm going to take you to church and make you confess."

They go to church and the father alerts the priest and makes the little boy sit in the confession booth and closes the door.

The boy says, "Dark in here." The priest says, "Do not start that shit again!"