Yours jokes
The doctor says, "Your wife is pregnant." The man says that he used a condom and the doctor says, "Yeah, but I didn't."
Dear math,
Please grow up and solve your own problems. I'm tired of solving them for you.
Thanks.
Who do you want on your basketball team in heaven?
Peter. He can deny Jesus three times.
Your forehead's so big, it makes Kanye's ego small.
What did the racist serial killer say to the cop?
“Wait, you’re getting paid?”
Memes
Balls in your jaws.
I would roast you but you're already so hot.
If you own a gun and you live in the USA, hide your gun upstairs. Biden can't get it.
Biden: *falls over on steps*
Whenever your ex says, "You'll never find someone like me," the answer to that is, "That's the point."
Son: Can I go to my friend's mum? Mum: No! Son: Dad was right, I am a son of a bitch! Mum: Bad news, but you're adopted!!
You're not completely useless. You can always be used as a bad example.
Your forehead is so big, your entire face is on your chin.
Boy 1: "Sonic is a fictional character."
Boy 2: "Yeah, just like your dad."
The school shooter: "I finally found you worthless crybabies!!"
The Quiet Kid: "How are a bag of chips and a mac11 the same?"
The school shooter: "I don't know."
The Quiet kid: "When you pull them out everybody wants to be your friend."
When you break up with your online girlfriend, and you hear your uncle crying in the other room.
Old soviet joke.
"Who is your mother?" "Our great Soviet country." "Who is your father?" "Our dear comrade Stalin." "What's your greatest desire?" "Becoming an orphan."
"Sir, in court, all your answers must be oral, okay?"
"Ok."
"What town did you grow up in?"
"Oral."
Someone: "I WANNA BE THE SUN OF YOUR LIFE!"
Me: Then stay at 1,000,000 km of me.
Last night, I burned an orphanage. There was one survivor who said I would regret it. I said, "What are you gonna do? Tell your parents?"
A man sees a small boy begging for money. He walks up to him and asks him if he is an orphan.
The boy asks, "What gave me away?"
The man responds, "Your parents."