Yours jokes

Face

  • You're so ugly that they faked a whole pandemic just so you can put on a mask to cover that ugly-ass face.

    Height

  • I'm 5'6", and my mom is 5'1" and 1/2. She always says she's going to get a suicide vest and fill it with bricks and squish me. I tell her good luck.

    And when she tries to hug me, she says, "You're too fucking tall, kid," so I usually reply with "Go get a stool then."

    Hairline

  • I know this girl, Kamelah. She say, "What are you looking at?" I said, "I’m just tryna figure out why it look like Santa stole your hairline."

    Goose

  • U mess with goose, he strain out all of your body juice.

    U mess with goose, he hang u with noose.

    Noose

  • "Do you have a noose?"

    "Nose?"

    "Yeah, noose- nose... I heard yours was stuffed lately--haha."

    "I actually smell something--like a corpse. Is it you?"

    "No."

    *Dying on the inside has never been so detectable.*

    Girlfriend

  • Me when my girlfriend comes home, I check her phone and there are 100 texts from a different guy asking her out, and her text says yes.

    Get the whip, you're out!

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