You're jokes
What did the fish say to the other fish when it got hooked?
"That's what you get for not keeping your mouth shut."
What is your address?
What's your favorite type of flour?
Don't know.
Mines self-raising.
Question: What's the smallest thing on earth?
Answer: Your brain.
If your shirt isn't tucked into your pants, does that mean your pants are tucked into your shirt?
What is your body like? Soft.
Your d*** size...
What is it called when the gynecologist slanders your grandfather?
A pap smear.
The average Irish person consumes 131.1 litres of beer, almost as much as your mum at night.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Terrier.
Terrier who?
Your Halloween decorations are terri-fying!
So a kid was hanging out with his mom and this man comes up to him and said, "Hi, I'm your new dad." The kid did not think about it, and then he did and said, "But I already have a dad." The mom said, "That was not your real dad."
Women say their baby daddies are trash like... woman, didn't he impregnate you and didn't he win your heart? I mean, he's not trash, you are!
Your mother is so fat, she actually went on a diet and started exercising, and I hear she's doing quite well now.
What wastes your money as you earn it?
Women.
"You're the bomb."
"No, you're the bomb."
A compliment in the US, an argument in the Middle East.
Me talks to an orphan: Hey, I have a joke.
Orphan: Go on then.
Me: Your family tree.
Yo, I feel like shit when you're around.
The first time I heard your voice, my foreskin fell off.
Monster: “I will devour your family.”
Orphan: “Oh.”
Your hairline looks like the Antarctica waves.