You're jokes
Pedophile: You dropped your candy.
Girl: Thanks!
Pedophile stares as she slowly bends over to pick up her candy.
Pedophile: It looks a bit dirty, do you wanna come back to my house and get a new one?
Girl: How far is your house?
Pedophile: It's that white one right over there.
Girl: You mean that van next to a dumpster?
Pedophile: Yep, it's that one.
Girl:.... Sure! :P
Audience:.........Dumbass girl.
You. You're the joke.
Your mom.
The lady was so fat that when she stepped on the scale, the scale responded with, "I need your weight, not your phone number!"
Knock knock. Who's there? Ieatmop. I eat mop who? Eww, you eat your poo?
Where do you get 30% of your agua? From AGUAfers.
My friend texted me and asked me, "Hey. What's your favorite emoji?"
I said, "😬😬😬😬😬😬😬"
She said, "Why?"
I said, "'Cause it's your twin."
They said time heals all wounds, well, I broke your watch.
Q: What's the best part about gardening?
A: Getting down and dirty with your hoes.
What happens when you see corn looking at you in your window?
A corn stalk!
Two brothers were arguing. One went: "You're an idiot!"
The other went: "Your brother's a mother!"
He replied: "Yeah, I know. Thanks for agreeing with me."
What's the best part about plowing your cousin?
- It makes your sister jealous.
Roses are red, violets are blue, your penis smells like stew, and I want to eat it too.
When your husband can’t afford a punching bag, he uses his wife.
Why is the disease lung cancer never hungry? Because it's eating your lungs.
The world's funniest joke? Your life.
Someone asked me, "How would you like your steak cooked?"
I said, "On a stove!"
A man looks at his friend and says, "If you and a friend go camping and you two get really drunk, and in the morning you wake up with a condom in your butt, would you tell anyone?" The friend says in a disgusted tone, "No." So the man says, "Okay, let's go camping."
Friend: How dark is your humor?
Me: It picks cotton.
Are you beef?
Because you're Carlos-Asada.