You jokes

"What does the word 'gay' mean?" asked a son of his father.

"It means 'happy'," replied the father.

"Oh," contested the son, "so you are gay then?"

"No, son, I have a wife."

How do you think they found out cows produce milk?

Two kids having fun in the barn.

What do KFC and pussy have in common?

Both are finger lickin' good, and after you are done eating, you have a box to put the bone in.

What can you never tell an orphan?

Go home to your parents.

Your mum is so smart, but she still can’t figure out why she had you.

Did you hear about the cemetery? I heard that people are dying to be there.

A computer is like a living organism. Its charger is its life support. If you "pull the plug," you are letting it slowly die.

Guy: "Can I tell you a joke?"

Spiderman: "Yes."

Guy: "You only have 11 months on your calendar."

Spiderman: "Why?"

Guy: *holds up knife* "Because I murdered May."

Do you know why no one speaks about George Washington?

John Adams turned him into atoms. John Adams was an alien.

Yo, Rob, you forgot to pay me cause you sucky sucky my thang.

AKA, you're up for adoption.

That one awkward moment you have to go ask your Chinese neighbor if they've seen your dog.

Did you know there was food on the plane that caused 9/11?

It was the bomb.

A duck walks into a bar. The duck says to the bartender, "Hey bartender, got any bread?" The bartender says, "No." Then the duck says, "Hey bartender, got any bread?" The bartender says, "NO!" The duck says, "Hey bartender, got any bread?" The bartender says, "No, and if you say that one more time I will nail your bill to this bar!" The duck says, "Hey bartender, got any nails?" The bartender says, "No." The duck says, "Well then, bartender, got any bread?"

Are you a banana...

because I find you a-peeling!

I heard that your forehead is so big that you could build a neighborhood on it.

If you give someone a plane ticket, they will fly for a day, but if you push them out of a plane, they'll fly for the rest of their life.

Me: Knock, knock.

Another person (OP): OP: Who's there? Me: Hatch. OP: Hatch who? Me: Bless you =) OP: But I didn't sneeze. Me: You just don't get a joke, do you?

What do you get when you mix a grizzly bear and milk? Mauled.

I saw a man sitting on the ledge of a bridge the other day, and asked him what was wrong. He responded with nobody loves me, so i told him that may be true but you dont wanna kill yourself you want to die of old age, or at least be murdered, suicide is for the weak. he responded with your right so I pushed him over the bridge, and he died of murder

Rape humor is not funny. Like if you agree.