You jokes
My son was thrown out of school for letting a schoolgirl wank him off.
"That's the third school this year..." I said to my son, "... Maybe teaching isn't for you."
People say that biting off your finger would be as easy as biting a carrot if your brain didn't try to stop you. How the f do people know that and how many people's fingers did they bite off before coming to that conclusion?
Why do you call a priest a father? Because calling them daddy would be too sus.
When you forget the pinata at the birthday party. The kids: "Aww man." But the emo kid just hung himself. Kids: "Yaaaaayyy." Parents: "Adjust, improvise, overcome, that is the way."
I asked an emo girl, "Do you ever get jealous of your phone when it dies?"
Funny Test Answers #1
What do you call a rich Asian?
Cha-ching!
Son: “Dad, did you get the results of the DNA test back?”
Dad: “Call me George.”
I would tell you an orphan joke, ehh I’ll just tell your parents instead.
Do you know why 6 is afraid of 7? Why? Because 7 ate 9 (8).
Do you know why 10 is scared? Why? Because he is between 9 and 11.
Follow me if you need advice, or just follow me.
Are you my depression, because I’m falling for you?
Teacher: "What do you think is your purpose in our society?"
Me: "To reduce the population by one."
Why don’t you act like your hairline and kindly take several steps back?
Q: What do you call a black prostitute in space?
A: The Blackhole.
If you were driving when all of a sudden a young kid and an old man run right in front of you, what do you hit?
The brakes, you sick bastard.
What do you call an apple that fell out of the tree?
An orphan.
Cosmetic surgery used to be such a taboo subject. Now you can talk about Botox, and nobody raises an eyebrow.
My teacher: If you could go anywhere, where would you go?
Me: Demon Slayer.
My teacher: Why?
The quiet kid: TO GET EATEN BY A DEMON OR BECOME ONE!!!
Why do Emos love Christmas? So they can pretend they're ornaments and hang themselves on trees. Hope you liked it, happy holidays!
Guys, we should not make fun of 9/11. Like, that stuff is just plain out crazy. Like, you all should not let that fly.