You jokes

Tower

What did the North Tower say to the South Tower?...

"Catch you later!"

Psychopath

Hey, I’m George, and this is how to figure out if someone is a psychopath.

Go into someone’s search history, and find “Cuphead ship fanfic”.

Hey George, why do you have Russia x America countryhumans?

Memes

Girl

1, 2 you built like a dork.

3, 4 you got no girl, 4, 5 you're shorter than a remote.

Stroke

Did you hear about the gay guy who got kicked off the golf course?

He was playing with too many strokes.

Ligma

Me: Hey, are you going to Sawcon?

Sensei: What is that?

Me: Saw con deez nu...

Sensei: Oh, is it for people with ligma?

Me: What’s ligm...

Sensei: 😈

Me: no no no no

Sensei: Ligma ba...

Word

A kindergarten teacher asks her students, "Do you know any words that start with P?"

Little Timmy responds with, "Elmo."

Punching Bag

If you're ever in need of a punching bag, just go to your local Alzheimer's unit.

They'll forget you were there in like three minutes.

Bull

Did you hear about the bull who went on a shooting rampage?

I guess he was a little deranged.

Baby

I'm okay with giving babies iPads, as long as the baby has anencephaly.

You can't get brain rot if you don't have a brain!

Abortion

Q. What do you say when your friend has an abortion?

A. May your baby rest in pieces.

Dog

Why can you rub a dog's nose in their pee when they go on the carpet but when I do the same to an Alzheimer's patient I get fired from the nursing home?