You jokes
It’s really hard to maintain a good body lately, unless you put it in a freezer.
What do you call a kid with autism who saw Star Wars?
Chewbacca.
Me at the Oscars when I see Jada Pinkett Smith, I said: "G.I. Jane 2, more like G.I. Jada 2, can't wait to see it."
So Will Smith is laughing and then suddenly, Will Smith walks up to me and punches me in the face.
Me: "Ow, oh, wow. Will Smith just smacked the shit out of me.” My nigga Smith goes: "KEEP MY WIFE'S NAME OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!" Me: "Maybe you should focus on keeping her friends out of hers."
What is the worst combination of illnesses?
Alzheimer’s and diarrhea. You’re running but can’t remember where.
The joke is you! 😂🤣😂🤣😂
What's the difference between babies and onions?
You don't cry cutting up babies.
Random person: We are taking away your freedoms to keep you safe.
Hitla: That's exactly what I said.
This is not a joke, nor did I come up with it.
If somebody calls you ugly, just hug them and say, "Life must be hard for you since you have visual impairment!"
You looking for jokes? I have one: your life.
What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe?
Fur Traders.
When I was teaching my dog tricks, a Chinese man came to me and asked, "Why were you playing with your food?"
what's the worst thing to say to an emo?
if you don't succeed the first time, try try try again.
Why should you always be friends with an emo kid?
They always hang around.
You can't YEE your last HAW!
But I put my BALLS in ur JAW.
The best part of working at an orphanage is you can give them family-size chips.
What's it called when a Black person makes a joke? A joke, you racist.
JK, dark humor.
How do you know your acne is getting out of hand? The blind start reading your face.
What do you call James Bond when he’s taking a bath?
Bubble 07.
What does the SpongeBob intro and a pedo have in common?
Are you ready, kids?🤣
My mom said that being straight is good, but if you're straight, how do you walk? So I decided to be gay.