You jokes
Science teacher: How many times can the earth fit into the sun?
Me: As many times as the earth can fit into you.
How do you get an emo out of the tree?
You cut the rope.
What do you call an emo's face?
Elmo's son.
There was this boy. He had diarrhea, and he kept asking to go to the bathroom, but the teacher said no. Next thing you know, he pooped himself in front of the class.
I jump and jump if you put bread in me too many times. What am I? A toaster.
High school crush: Why do you always look so sad?
Me: My mom is dead, and my favorite grandma, and my uncle killed both of them, and now he's in jail.
High school crush: Shit. Sorry about that.
Me: And my crush hasn't asked me out.
High school crush: Who is it?
Me: You.
Him: Goodbye (as he runs away and never comes back)
Me: Fuck that.
What's one advantage of being an orphan?
Nobody can make mama jokes about you. 🌚
What do you call an orphan with parents?
I don't know... what?
Kidnapped. :)
What do you call a gay drive-by?
A fruit roll-up.
What do you call a pretty person who loves Rolls? A roll model.
Do they say you are what you eat?
That makes Bulma a VEGETARIAN if u know what I'm SAIYAN.
When you tell her you are about to "COME," she says no, don't, please just keep going.
Shenron: THAT IS BEYOND MY POWER.
You may have a footlong, but I have a SHENLONG. :)
What did Vegeta say to Bulma?
What?
Can I show you my new move? It's called BIG BANG ATTACKKKK! :)
You look pretty today... April Fools!
I have a friend of mine from school. I always see them with bangs, so I never knew what their forehead looked like until one day they came... Their forehead was bigger than Mount Everest, that you can make an entire Olympics mountain climbing audition on that forehead! :)
Luisa: The ship doesn't swerve, as it heard how big the iceberg is.
Captain of the Titanic: Wait, what did you say?
3 minutes later:
Why didn't I listen to the strong one?
My mom told me to clean the sink, but I couldn’t find you.
I told the judge I thought she was unconscious before she woke up crying. The judge asked: "Why didn't you drug her again so she would forget?"
Why’s it so hard to break up with a Japanese girl? You gotta drop the bomb twice.