You jokes

Some guy asked me, "Are you better than my meat?" I said, "No, I'm not better, I just beat it all the time."

Little Johnny sits on a chair. He notices he is sitting on something. Then he sees a plastic di**. He asks his mom, "What's that?" and Mom didn't know, so when his dad comes home from work, he sees him with the plastic di** and says, "Son, why you messing with my personal toy?"

I saw a Cuban prisoner. I asked, "Why are you running from the cops?" He said, "I'M FREE AT LAST!"

DB: I'm the only shotgun with more than 1 barrel!

Lancaster: Are you sure about that?

DB: huh?

Lancaster: I have 4 barrels!

DB: WHAT!?

Penta Barrel: I got 5!

DB: *insert becoming uncanny*

Dual Hexagon shotgun: I got 12!

The others: HOW!?

*and that's how an argument started.*

You are like a thunderstorm; when you go away, like your dad, everyone is happy.

What do you call a genderless child?

It's not a mister, it's not a misses, I'm more for a mystery.

Do you know why the cake doesn't ever fight anyone?

He says, "Take a peace of that!" while entering a fight.

What do you call a person with no arms and legs?

You can call him whatever you want; he's not coming.

What do you call a dog with no legs?

A: It doesn’t matter; it won’t come anyway.