What happened when your parents dropped you off at the orphanage? They got sued for littering.
You Jokes
Beans for centuries have been called "false friends," because they have a tendency to talk behind one's back. If you get my drift. 🤣
Q: What's the difference between a fetus and an onion?
A: One makes you cry when you chop it into pieces.
Judge: We shall now sentence you for the murder of your parents.
Accused: Please consider a lenient sentence, your honor.
Judge: But why?
Accused: Because I’m an orphan.
I own a gun with Nazi rounds and shot a guy who broke into my house. He said, “Did you just shoot me with a Nazi round?” and I replied, “Do you mean Nein millimeter?”
I jump off a cliff and said I hate you, dumb blond, and eagle...Then I said to my wife, "We're done, Blondie," and said to my friend, "You're a dumbhead eagle!"
Did you hear about the new emo pizza? It cuts itself.
What do you call a kid that’s cold and his name is war?
Cold War.
You when you face the boss the first time: :)
You when Dark Souls boss music starts playing on the second phase: :(
You when you ask why do you hear boss music: <(
You when the boss goes straight to his final phase after 1 hit:
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Here's a tip for cow tipping from TheRussianBadger.
"So if you see Otis from Barnyard, make sure you blast his ass from a distance!"
Are you the Lusitania 'cause I wanna fire a torpedo inside you?
Are you feeling down? Because I wanna feel you up.
Are you the Lusitania 'cause I wanna fire a torpedo into you?
Hell you fuck, bitch, dick!
The name is Doe, Dilbert Doe. You can call me Dil.
What do you call a selfie that is taken by an orphan?
Answer: A family photo.
What pizza 🍕 do you order for Christmas?
Cheeses Crust!
As a lifelong farmer, I was excited that Ligue 1 was moving up the UEFA ranking toward an Industrial Revolution and I can finally leave the farm. Alas, Pessi joined and we went down a rank because he is so finished. Shame on you Pessi, now I have to go back to shoveling cow shit.
What do you call a phone that talks?
A reader in a leader.
What do you call a group of emo kids?
The suicide squad.
