You jokes

Question:

Did you hear the one about MAGA people?

Answer:

It "sucks" just like they do!

Orphan

An orphan walked up to St. June's Family Hospital.

Doctor: "Sorry kid, you can't be in here."

Kurt Cobain

Did you know Kurt had dandruff?

Found his head and shoulders behind the couch.

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  • Family

    Girl: "Dad."

    Dad: "Do I love you?"

    Girl: "I am a prostitute."

    Dad: "Yes."

    Woman 2: "Dad."

    Dad: "Right?"

    Woman 2: "I'm a woman too."

    Father: "God, do you love children?"

    Boy: "Yes..."

    Dyslexic

    Did you hear about the dyslexic couple who were struggling to have sex? They kept doing the 96 positions.

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  • Blind

    How do you punish blind kids?

    Put them in a round room and tell them to sit in the corner.

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  • Emo

    What do you call an emo kid at the bottom of the ocean?

    A good start.

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  • Orphan

    Doctor: "I am so sorry, I cannot see you today."

    Orphan: "Oh, okay. What about tomorrow?"

    Doctor: "No, I can't see you ever."

    Orphan: "Why?"

    Doctor: "Because I am a family doctor."

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  • Orphan

    Do you know the F in "orphan" stands for family?

    There is no F in "orphan".

    Exactly.

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  • Two hunters are in the woods when one of them collapses. He's not breathing and his gaze is blank. The other hunter grabs his phone and calls emergency services: "My friend is dead! What do I do?"

    The emergency dispatcher replies: "Calm down. I can help you. First, make sure he's really dead."

    Silence on the other end, then a gunshot. Back on the phone, the hunter asks: "Okay, now what?"

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  • Dyslexic

    Have you heard about the dyslexic devil worshipper?

    He sold his soul to Santa.

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  • Woman

    What’s the difference between a woman and a mosquito?

    A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it.

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  • Lesbian

    What do you call a closet with two lesbians inside?

    A liquor cabinet.

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  • Terrorist

    What do you call a terrorist in a bath?

    A bath bomb.

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  • Catholic

    Did you know that good Catholic girls like to WAP?

    Yeah, they are all about Worship and Prayer.

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