You jokes
A school shooter enters a kindergarten classroom. Little Timmy says, “He’s my daddy!”
The teacher, Mr. Mortez, screams. Little Timmy then says, “Mr. Mortez, my daddy says you’re a big fat whale and he wants to roll you all the way to Canada!” *pushes Mr. Mortez* Little Timmy says, “Hail f**king Canada!”
A kindergarten teacher asks her students, "Do you know any words that start with P?"
Little Timmy responds with, "Elmo."
What do you call a flooded hospital?
Vegetable soup.
What do you call two Chinese lesbians?
Two can't chew.
No matter how lonely you get, you have Explain Bear.
Explain Bear is always there for you.
Have you heard of the book about the transgender whale?
It’s called "Maybe Dick."
What do you call two guys fighting over a slut?
Tug of whore.
What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?
Tell her to slow down and use lubricants.
What’s the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?
You can’t hear an enzyme.
Hey, do you know who Dragon248 is? No, who is he? He's dragging these balls off your face.
I'm okay with giving babies iPads, as long as the baby has anencephaly.
You can't get brain rot if you don't have a brain!
What do you call lesbian twins?
Lick-A-Likes.
What do you call two lesbians in a closet? A liqueur cabinet.
There were four men eating dinner on the Titanic when it hit the iceberg.
The waiter said, "We have to get to the lifeboats!"
The teacher said, "What about the kids?"
The lawyer said, "Fuck the kids."
The priest said, "Do you think we'll have time?"
What's the difference between hungry and horny?
Where you stick the cucumber.
What do you call a group of black people in a shed?
Antique farm equipment.
What do you call a homosexual wrestler?
Gay Mysterio.
Did you hear about the nun that got kicked out of the convent?
She got caught squatting on the cucumbers in the garden.
Did you hear about the nun that got kicked out of the convent?
She got caught squatting on the cucumbers in the garden.
A man asks God, "Hello God, why did you make my wife so dumb?"
God replies, "So she would love you..."