When you tell an Asian kid it’s raining cats and dogs and he’s like, “Just open your mouth and close your eyes!”
You Jokes
Person: "How many people have you had intercourse with?"
Me: "Nun."
Want to know how a joke becomes a dad joke? Just wait for it to leave you and never come back.
Do you know that Helen Keller had a dog?
Neither did she.
"This is the dude who assassinated JFK."
"If you got a question, just shoot!"
People love you.
Don't die.
What do you call an Asian Chihuahua?
A Konichiuahua.
Can we have sex, because if we don't, I can't like you, big, thick booty!
So let's have sex in bed, you sexy woman, or behind a tree, because shoving my dick in your pussy is a very nice feeling while sucking your ass.
Okay, so I know this is not a joke, but I wanted to take some time to say if you have autism, you are still amazing. You are lovely in every way, and if people bully you, don't listen because they are wrong. You are cute, and I know how it feels. I have ADHD, and I get bullied a lot, but I don't let that get to me because I know what they are saying is wrong and not true. People with autism, stay strong; you got this. I will be your friend by heart, even if it's not in person.
Why are you so white?
Because you have no lotion on.
You know you have weird Indian parents when you can hear them canilingus each other.
A weasel walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Wow, I’ve never seen a weasel before. What can I get you?”
“Pop,” goes the weasel.
Where do you take someone who’s been injured in a peek-a-boo accident?
To the I.C.U.
What do you call Helen Keller after she killed 10 people?
Helen Killer.
Person: You can't kill an orphan!
Me: What are they going to do, go tell their parents?
Papyrus: Sans, I have a joke. What do you call someone lazy and incompetent?
Sans: What do you call them?
Papyrus: YOU! NOW GET UP AND CLEAN YOUR ROOM, YOU LAZY BONES!
What did Joe Biden say to the dog? I'm gonna molest you.
Like if you will sub to Patty Mahomes.
Comment if you will sub to Parker Finch.
You know what's REALLY "Ironic"?
Answer:
These REALLY ARE the "Worst Jokes" I've ever heard!
How do you give an "Alabama Girl" a nice compliment?
Answer: You say to her, "Hey, NICE TOOTH!"
