You jokes
Your girlfriend/boyfriend says: "I'm dating your uncle..." You start crying and you look under the bed and your uncle says: "Damn."
Yo mama so lazy that she didn’t give birth to you until you were 15.
Yo mama so stupid that she thought Subway was a place where you buy subways.
What do you call a nut that screws and then bolts?
An escapee from a mental hospital.
America: Saying, "I beg your pardon" in British English is like saying; "What did you say to me you orphaned big forehead shitty ass small dick bitch?"
UK: You Americans are so fucking rude.
America: Oh, I'm SoRrY mIsTeR fAnCy PaNts 👖
I just overheard this but:
How do you make a party in space?
You planet.
Once Roblox popped up in my server, be like, "Roblox, what are you doing?"
Me: "What the heck?" Me: "How did I get in your server?"
Roblox: "You've been banned for just cheating!"
You're so fat, when you jumped, the whole planet wiggled.
What do you call a person in a wheelchair that lives in Africa?
Dry Vegetable.
Bully: Shut up.
Me: I don't shut up, I grow up, and when I look at you, I throw up.
Do you know that foundation called "Autism Speaks"?
No, it screeches.
Are you gay? Yeah, because I loved you.
What do you do when you see a lady in a wheelchair?
You grab a stick and put it through the wheelchair and call her nunchucks.
What do you call a Pegasus that is being sus?
A megasus!
How do you call an iPhone cover in Germany?
An apple bag. 😜
Why You should never poop on the floor in an Apple Store?
Because they don't have Windows. 🤢 🤣
Dad: Ok son, if you fail this test, you're no longer my child, ok?
Son: Ok dad.
AFTER TEST
Dad: Hey son, how'd the test go?
Son: Son?
You want to hear a rape joke? Yeah. Damn you ruined it.
Did you hear about the German girl being raped by 10 men? She shouted, "nein, nein," so one of them left.
I was watching The Conjuring with an emo person. She said she likes the part where the girl was hanging. I said, "Why? Because you wish it were you?"