You Jokes

People

You people are sick!!!!!!!!!!!!!! None of these are funny. Sick sick sick!!!!!!!

Syndrome

What do you call a person with Down syndrome who graduated high school?

Impossible!

  • 0
  • Angel

    You know every time we think of sex, an angel dies.

    We ran out of dead people hundreds of years ago.

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  • Brother

    What do you call a redneck sister who runs faster than her brothers?

    A virgin.

  • 3
  • Church

    A little boy went to church. The priest said, "Get in the following positions: stand, then kneel, then bow." The little boy replies, "Can you hurry up and f**k me already?"

    Cheese

    If you want any pictures of cheese for your laptop, I've got enough to Philadelphia.

    Suicide

    Allan: What are you doing Saturday night?

    Museum girl: Committing suicide.

    Allan: What about Friday night?

  • 2
  • Horse

    A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?"

    The horse replies, "My wife just died of cancer, and my alcohol addiction is tearing my family apart."

    The bartender responds, saying "Oh" sympathetically. "Sucks to be you!" the bartender yells, throwing a bottle of wine at the horse.

    Paedophile

    I'm 34 and I went on a date with my 19 year old girlfriend. I got heckled with "you're a paedophile!" and "you sick F...!" Completely ruined our 10th anniversary!

    Scooter

    The sad thing is when they ride the scooters in Wal-Mart... Really, you declining to walk is what got your fat ass in that scooter to begin with... And damned if they aren't buying diet soda... Please... cull this shit... We don't need them in society... KFC is not a disease.

    Line

    How do you know you're following a DeLorean? The white line disappears.

    Guy

    Are you guys alright?

    If you answered yes then you are wrong. You are all LEFT. Kill me, hmph.

    (This joke was taken from that none funny b*tch on Britain's Got Talent)