Son - Dad, I've been expelled from school for having sex with a girl in my class.
Dad - Son, that's the 2nd school this year! Maybe teaching isn't for you!
My girlfriend is 19 and I'm 29. We go out to eat in a restaurant, but the whole time I have to deal with being accused of being a pedo, being called disgusting and disturbed.
It completely ruined our 10 year anniversary.
Year 10 English.
What's the difference between a five-year-old and a Democrat?
The five-year-old doesn't expect you to do everything for them.
(Vote for Ted Cruz, Ben Shapiro 2020)
My dad and I have been playing hide and seek. It's been 15 years and I still haven't found him.
Will you remember me in 7 years?
(Yes)
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Ever had a migraine? Yeah, sorry that’s my fault.... couple years ago all my grains got loose.
10 years ago my dad went to get milk. He said when he got back, he was going to tell me a joke. That joke better be worth it!
Hey, guess what I got for my birthday.
No, what did you get? Older.
What's a similarity between The Ark of the Covenant, The Holy Grail and a bunch of 12 year olds?
They are all locked in the Priest's basement.
What's the difference between a PC and a 6 year old? I don't have to clean out my PC.
A 6-year old told the class the first time she got aids, the teacher listened she said she scraped her knee the girl was sent to a asylum when she got out she was 20 she had aids
I like my lovers like I like my whiskey, 12 years old and mixed up with coke.
Chuck Norris would have died a couple of years ago, but death hasn't built up the courage to tell him.
What's the difference between an American 12-year-old and an African 12-year-old? About 40 pounds.
WHAT’S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A BOOMERANG AND MY DAD only the boomerang came back its been 14 years wheres my dad
What’s the best thing about sex with 119 year olds? There are 100 of them
What do you call a 100-year-old frog?
An old croak!
When a family friend passed away, my granddaughter took her three-year-old son to visit the widow. As they approached the front door, she whispered to the boy, “Make sure to tell her how sorry you are.”
He whispered back, “Why? I didn’t kill him.”
I told my friend yesterday he's literally my dad.
He didn't show up for the rest of the year.
