Year

Year jokes

Add joke

I can't believe I got fired at the calendar factory. I mean... all I did was take a day off!

Why did the mummy leave his tomb after 3000 years?

Because he thought he was old enough to leave home.

That is one of the very, very, very, very, VERY WORST jokes ever.

If you read this, you fucked your dad and your 4-year-old sister, you sick fuck... At least wait till they are 15.

Four cows went to the county fair. They saw a sign that said that next year animals can enter a singing contest. They decided that they would enter next year. So they called their group the "4 Cs Quartet" since their names were Clementine, Candy, Cookie, and Columbine.

They discovered how they could win. After a discussion, they decided to eat as much corn as possible, so they would sing in perfect 4 part hominy.

A 23 year old priest walks into a high school with an automatic weapon. He tells those who believe in God to stand up and leave.

To the children who don't leave, he says, "Do not worry my children, I shall make thou 'hole-y' as well."

He then proceeds to shoot all of the students left.

  • 0

    • I slip on the wet floor, haha silly water :)

    -Kachow!!!!!!!!!!!

    -LMQ, You know what comes before lighting? THUNDER KACHIGA

    Mom: You need to grow up. You're so immature.

    Me: *glares* Get out of my castle....

    Mom: It's a pillow fort.

    Me: Why can't I have an imagination! ?

    Mom: You're almost 19 years old.

    Me: Not good enough... OUT!

    I did so much research that I got bone-tired from doing this, tibia honest. You probably didn't find that humerus. I got a skeleton of these puns. I guess I could learn a femur puns. I was wondering if the creators of this site could talus how they come up with puns or maybe give some advice? I'm only 14 years old.

    I called my boss the other Monday and told him I needed the day off because I was sick. He said, "How sick?"

    I said, "Well, I'm in bed with my 12-year-old sister."

    It was the year 1912. I was in the SS Titanic, and I woke from a dream to think, "I've heard of wet dreams, but is that WATER?"

  • 1

    • My dad said he'd be back later after he walked out the door with a suitcase.

    Who takes a suitcase to the grocery store? Silly daddy!

    I finally got my wife to shut up.

    Who knew all I had to do was bury her alive all these years, ha! Try telling me to get my feet off the couch now, Karen!

  • 0

    • Stephen Hawking had a heart attack the year before his death.

    They took him to PC World for repairs.

    Statistically, 1 in 10 people live next door to a pedophile. But not me, I live next to a 10-year-old boy with a fat ass.

    Which legendary Dutch wanderer slept for twenty years, except when he got up to pee?

    Rip Van Tinkle.