World jokes

In some places in the world, you can't get an abortion even after rape. That's so fucked up.

You serve your time, you get out, and you STILL have to pay child support. What a nightmare.

How is the world like dirt?

Because we don't think twice about it.

My daughter is the most adorable little girl in the world. She's got my sister's eyes.

The world exploded, so now I need to visit Uranus.

Sketchy dude: If you push this button you get 100 million dollars but 100 million people would die.

Me: If I push it more than once do I get more money?

Sketchy dude: Yes, but more people die.

Me: *rapidly pushes button* This is how you solve world hunger.

Sketchy dude: ... wtf, you're insane.

Me: ...

Why can't you tell anyone about space?

Because it's too out of this world!

How do you create the world's quickest human pyramid?

Turn on the gas chamber.

There are only 2 things I hate in this world:

1. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures. 2. The French.

Why are there no pharmacies in Africa?

Because you can’t take medicine on an empty stomach.

When you're depressed about the world :( but you remember you will soon die :)

how to solve world hunger and over population?

Cannibalism.

How many feminists do you need to change a light bulb?

One. She puts the bulb up and waits for the world to revolve around her.

...just kidding-

- none. They can't change anything.

What is the world's greatest invention? The ball gag, do you know why? Honestly, officer, I never heard her say no.

The only thing brighter than my future is the fire on the World Trade Center.

How do you stop a MeToo feminazi from telling the world about being raped? Easy: just rape her mouth shut.

There are 10 types of people in this world.

Those that know binary and those that don't.

9/11 wasn’t a terrorist attack, it was the world’s introduction to Sky Football

China has a population of a billion people. One billion.

That means even if you’re a one in a million kind of guy, there are still a thousand others exactly like you.

Sans: Zzzzzzzz.

Papyrus: SANS, WAKE UP!!

Sans: What is it, dude?

Papyrus: A human has fallen from the surface world!

Sans: And you gotta BONE to pick with 'em??

What's Gru's favorite Beyoncé lyric? "Who run the world... Gorls."