Imagine working at the World Trade Center, only for Osama bin Laden to call and ask if he could crash at your place.
I remember when I was a kid, I thought the world used to be colorless.
I was kinda right. They used to not let colors in a lot of areas.
A man is walking on a bridge and sees a lady over the railing.
Man: "Ah, suicidal eh? Are you gonna jump?" Lady: "Yep. I hate this world." Man: "Well, if you're gonna die, can we have sex before you jump?" Lady: "Hell no! You creep!" Man: "Ok, fine. I guess I'll just wait until your corpse washes onto the shore."
People are making end of the world jokes, like there's no tomorrow.
You're so ugly the whole world faked a virus just so you could wear a mask.
I’m old enough to remember innocent times when the worst headline was plane hijackers flying into buildings.
Decisions taken by world leaders often have great significance during a crisis.
The Americans, in particular, are suffering many losses during the current global pandemic. Remember, in the 1980's they had Ronald Reagan, Johnny Cash, and Bob Hope.
In 2020 they have Donald Trump, no Cash, and no Hope!
I popped some fireworks and told my Vietnamese grandfather that World War 3 started.
My mom tells me when I get into an argument with her that she brought me into this world and she can take me out. Sometimes I wanna tell her that I can do that for her.
We all know that Lincoln and Kennedy are the most open-minded presidents in the world.
Man 1: Why don’t we just put all the debt in the world on one man, then kill him?
Man 2: We tried that once. It started a cult.
Some day, Canada will take over the world. -- And then we'll all be sorry.
This is how my mom always threatens me: "I brought you into this world, I can bring you out of it too." That's why I only have 2 siblings left.
I wonder where the bodies are?
What is the fastest thing in the world?
James Charles when he sees little boys.
Today a child asked if I was an angel. I asked why, and he said, "Mommy says that angels have marks on their wrists because they don't want to be in this world."
Why did Joe Biden visit Hiroshima? Because the city has the hottest prepubescent girls in the world.
Why were the Twin Towers mad? Because when they spawned in a Minecraft world, all they got was plains.
What type of people think rape jokes are funny?
Only the coolest people in the world! I fucking love you guys 😂
Doctor: What makes you feel depressed?
Me: I used to work at the World Trade Center, before the plane hit.
Doctor: A lot of people fell to pieces after that.
What is Africa's most played game?
The Hunger Games.
