World War II jokes
What did Hitler tell the eye doctor?
“I can na-zi.”
Hitler visits a lunatic asylum. The patients give the Hitler salute. As he passes down the line, he comes across a woman who isn't saluting.
"Why are you not saluting like the others?" Hitler barks.
"Mein Führer, I'm the nurse," she responds. "I'm not crazy!"
My dad killed himself because he was Hitler.
How does Hitler tie his shoes?
In tiny Knotsies.
What do you call Hitler speeding?
The Fast and the Fuherous.
Why did Hitler keep on f***ing England?
Because it had a Great Booty!
Blame Austria for creating Hitler, who we know today. He failed art school.
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
*slaps* "We ask ze questions!"
Why did Hitler say "nein"? Because he just got raped, bitch!
Guys, don’t put the Holocaust books in the fiction section, it was the worst mistake of my life!
Why did Hitler stop playing Golf?
He kept getting stuck in the Bunker.
What is the name of Hitler's WiFi?
The local Aryan network.
Enough with the Nazi jokes.
They make me führeious!
Hippity hoppity, Hiroshima, Nagasaki.
What is Hitler's favorite animal?
A dolphin.
What is the difference between Usain Bolt and Hitler?
Usain Bolt can finish a race.
What was Hitler's lucky number?
Nein.
Two guys watching a war movie at a bar are talking. One says to the other, "The Nazis starved my dad to death in a concentration camp during the war."
The other says, "My dad died in a camp as well... he broke his neck."
First guy says, "How did he break his neck?"
Second guy says, "He fell out of the guard tower."
Why is it hard to break up with a Japanese girl?
Because you have to drop the bomb twice for her to get it.
Where did Hitler send kids with ADHD?
Concentration camp.