Work Jokes

What do you call an Autistic kid?

A work of Daniel.

Did you hear about the blonde that worked at the Dollar Store?

She called for a price check.

Where did the one legged lady work?

IHOP

What kind of jokes doesn’t work out?

Fat people jokes.

If I ever ran for public office, I'd make Rajan a call center employee again.

A two-panel image shows a cat sitting in front of a computer with the text "When your cat messages your boss..." The second panel shows a chat with a string of random characters and the message "Absolutely. Smartest thing you've ever said."

*Me walking into the nail salon* Hi, I'm here for my 3:45 appointment.

*Nail tech:* Ok, sweety, come and sit down.

*Me sits down in the chair*

*Nail tech:* You want long nail, short nail? Um, long nail. You want boyfriend?!! Yes, ma'am. Ok, let me work magic. Ok.

*gives me short nail* Bro, I asked for long nail, but you said BF, but u look lesbian.

*walks out without paying*

*Nail tech gives money to a customer* There u win.

*customer:* I told u she would.

So a kid was crying...I asked him what was wrong

I LOVE WORKING AT AN ORPHANAGE!!!

Why do orphan hate school because of home work

Hello everyone how is your day today?

so i was walking around the outside of the buliding and i saw a kid and asked “where’s your parents” I love working at the orphanage

I think i would like a job cleaning mirrors, it's just something I could really see myself doing.

"I work with animals," the guy says to his Tinder date. "That's so sweet," she replies. "I like a man who loves animals. Where do you work?" "I'm a butcher," he says.

Bro, you ever think while driving the moped why they call it a footrest when the foot never lets it rest? The foot is working harder than the engine. You push, push, but still go the same speed like a turtle with a bad mood during a rabbit race...

Why did the tangerine copy off other people's work?

Because the tangerine was unORANGEinal!

The bakery I worked at got robbed. They demanded the dough; apparently, it couldn't be baked first.

Little boy: Momma?

Mom: Yes, my dear.

Little boy: One day I wanna work in McDonald's.

Mom: Why!?

Little boy: Just to see if their ice cream machine is actually broken.

So there’s this air purifier in my room, right? It’s really noisy, so I unplugged it to sleep better, and sure enough, I fell asleep faster. So I came to the conclusion: if I unplug noisy machines, people will sleep better.

It worked really well in my local hospital.