Work jokes

How are Black people like communism?

Because they’ll never work, but some of them are willing to give it a shot.

I was playing hide and seek at work the other day. Unfortunately, it ended with me in the hospital, though; ICU.

I saw your mother get into a white Ford Taurus on the corner of Milton and Halliburton, and you're still trying to tell me she ain't got no job cause she "can't get a ride to work?"

Wanna hear a construction joke?

Nah, I'm still working on it.

Did you hear about the delivery boy that worked for that Italian Restaurant down the street?

Yeah, he Pasta-Way.

I have a joke about construction.

I'm still working on it.

I work at a tire shop.

I'm pretty tired.

I have so many cash machine jokes.

But none of them seem to work ATM.

Why did Daveon get fired from his job at the orange juice factory? Because he couldn't concentrate.

So, a guy walks into a gas station and walks to the person working and says, "Can I have a Kit Kat Chunky?" So she gets him one, and then he says, "No, I want a normal Kit Kat, you fat bitch!"

What's the same with a controller and a woman?

They both work if you hit them.

Here are some skeleton jokes.

You know the average person tries too hard and works himself to the bone.

If that joke didn't tickle your funny bone, I can give you a real humorous joke.

I used to play the trumpet, now I play the xylo-bone.

I'm always happy; nothing gets under my skin.

I made you some turkey for lunch. Bone appetit!

I'm glad I had you; I'm no longer bonely.

I've got a skele-ton of more jokes, but I'm just giving you one more.

Did you hear about the skeleton ninja? He was very skullful (skillful)!

My boss doctor said that we are getting a surgeon coming in tomorrow. I'm super excited to work with him. The next day, we had to do our first-ever open heart surgery, so me and the surgeon spent many hours on this patient. We finished the surgery and went outside for a smoke, and we were talking. I said, "Why did you keep the patient's blood on your glove?"

He replied, "We in my free time I test it for anything diseases, HIV." The next day, I got invited to his house, and we had some drinks. I said, "This is amazing red tea. What is in it?" Just the 2000 people you have cut open.

The only profession where one could have coronavirus and still go to work is a suicide terrorist.

What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?

"SUPPLIES!"

I asked my new girlfriend how many men she’d had before me.

She said not to worry, she could count them all on one hand.

Unfortunately, this was when I noticed she’s holding her cell phone with a calculator app open. I took note of her wallet inside a picture of what appeared to be 10 guys. I asked and she said that’s my fam as well. I noticed an Alabama driver's license. I asked which one was her dad. She said that she doesn’t talk to him anymore because he had sex with the boss’s daughter. I casually asked what he did for work. Self-employed? She said that’s the last time I use ancestry.com!

If I ever ran for public office, I'd make Rajan a call center employee again.

What kind of jokes doesn’t work out?

Fat people jokes.

What do you call an Autistic kid?

A work of Daniel.

Did you hear about the blonde that worked at the Dollar Store?

She called for a price check.