Work Jokes

I used have a friend who worked at a car shop who liked hunting. I’m not friends with him anymore because he turned my dog into a car-pet.

Prankster is Backster...DANG IT: Hey guys, prank for today is when I lied about feeling sick so I won't have to go to school. Introduction: This prank was commentited a week ago! Around 5:00 a.m. in the morning! 1. I got out some eggs, milk, salt, and a little bit of mashed olives...will those are main ingreidents. 2. I mixed it all up for about 2 mins just make it look really like barf...no going to school today! 3. I put it under the sofa just give it some solid scence to it. 4. I fix my breakfast eggs and becon. Then when my mom comes down I...PULL OUT MY FAKE BARF!!!!! News flash make a fake excuse for her to leave! My excuse is "I need some thing its in my room I don't want to get cause it would wast time" She fell for it. Then I pull out my FAKE barf which looks like real barf. Then you say or I said "Mom I don't feel so good''! News flash: Don't over sell it think about all that boring school work! and guess what she fell for it so I spend all day doing nothing...aboulty nothing! Will thats the prankster anymore pranks you want ask me in the comment section! Byeeeeeeeeeee

*tibia honest, it takes a lot of spine to memorize all the bones in the skeletal system. i mean, there's a skele-ton of em! you gotta be boned up for the skeletal system exam, buddy chum pal. now that was a humerus ribtickling skelepun. besides, if ya don't know all of the bones in the skeletal system, get boned, fucking numbskull. did those tickle your funny bone? now i've been working down to the bone typing these puns, kid. now if you hate all these, i won't be bothered, i got thick skin! but first, lemme take a skelfie in the skelevator playing my trom-bone. now, i gotta go to grillby's. they got a discount on spare-ribs. bone-voyage, my homeslice breadslice dawg.

What kind of jokes doesn’t work out? Fat people jokes.

When your legs forget how to work after leg day *I can't climb the stairs* Michael Myers right behind me* Runs like I'm a track star*

Today we need to teach our teens about having safe sex while using contraceptives. condoms 99 percent effective birth controll 99 percent effective ect just be like me and use underage 7 year olds works 100 percent of the time ( only cost 20 years in jail ;)

Q:How do you know if an Asian broke into your house?

A:all your home work and the Rubix cube u spent a year on and still can’t solve it is solved🤓🤓🤓🤓

What's the only time women are doing real work? When they are giving blow jobs.

A magic genie tells Tom,"I can make anything of yours disappear!" Tom:[raises his mug]: Okay,get rid of my tea. Genie:poof! om:it didn't work.

a fat man was checking his weight and sucking in his fat belly a physicist saw it and said thats not how law of conservation of mass works plot twist the fat man jumped on the physicist and proved him wrong now the physicist doesnt have mass

If someone told me to bring up 9/11. They were trying to make a funny joke but it didnt work. That one really *crashed and burned*

STUPID FAKER IF UR TRYING TO GET ME TO LEAVE THE SITE IT WON'T WORK

What is bus driver that does not work? A useless one ☝️

There was this intern that worked at an orphanage and she burnt it down luckily she don't have to tell there parents

When Stephen Hawking entered Heaven and met with the Lord, after a short interview God asked : " Hey Stephen, I need you to explain to me how does all this stuff work ? "

On Christmas Mexicans wake up in the morning, then take a nap. Joking I know they work hard, they run all the way to the border to decorate the barbed wire.