Work jokes

A man with no arms is tasked with a lot of jobs. Then he says to his boss, "I can't handle all of this!"

Attended my boss's funeral to pay my respects. On my way out, I leaned over his casket and whispered lightly, "Well, look who's thinking outside the box now."

Bro, go work at McDonald's. Your hairline inspired their logo!

How are Black people like communism?

Because they’ll never work, but some of them are willing to give it a shot.

I will never forget the moment when my father saw me masturbating. He said, "Son, what are you doing? I'm on a video conference - get out of my office!"

What's the difference between your job and a dead prostitute?

Your job still sucks!

I remember my first day back when working at a camp. I was so surprised when the trains arrived.

Wanna hear a construction joke?

Nah, I'm still working on it.

Did you hear about the delivery boy that worked for that Italian Restaurant down the street?

Yeah, he Pasta-Way.

One time, I was working this steamroller when the guy who I squashed farted.

I guess that’s what you call “FLAT”ulence.

The worst part about working for the department of unemployment is when you get fired, you still have to show up the next day.

Did you know your pupils are the last part to stop working when you die? They dilate.

Why do people hit their electronics when they don’t work?

You keep the tradition of hitting black things.

My screen lock is my favorite picture of my wife. When I'm on a 14-hour shift, being miserable, hating my life... I pull out my phone and gaze at the picture of my wife. Then I realize it's better here than at home with her ass.

Why did Daveon get fired from his job at the orange juice factory? Because he couldn't concentrate.

Why did the frog take the bus to work?

His car got toad.

What do you call a white woman working at an all black company?

Crack/her

I saw your mother get into a white Ford Taurus on the corner of Milton and Halliburton, and you're still trying to tell me she ain't got no job cause she "can't get a ride to work?"

I was playing hide and seek at work the other day. Unfortunately, it ended with me in the hospital, though; ICU.

It’s about drive, it’s about power, We stay hungry, we devour, Put in the work, put in hours, And take what’s ours.