Work jokes
Boy: *scares girl*
Girl: "Gosh, you scared me, Jesus!"
Jesus: *Arrives out of nowhere and said, "What is it, human? I got work to do."*
Girl: What work?
Jesus: "Coming out of nowhere when people say 'Jesus.'"
Your mom is so fat that she works as a hydraulic press in a car factory!
Q: What do you call a skeleton that goes to school but doesn't do any work?
A: Lazy bones.
A man with no arms is tasked with a lot of jobs. Then he says to his boss, "I can't handle all of this!"
What's the difference between your job and a dead prostitute?
Your job still sucks!
How are Black people like communism?
Because they’ll never work, but some of them are willing to give it a shot.
Why do people hit their electronics when they don’t work?
You keep the tradition of hitting black things.
Why did the frog take the bus to work?
His car got toad.
Attended my boss's funeral to pay my respects. On my way out, I leaned over his casket and whispered lightly, "Well, look who's thinking outside the box now."
Bro, go work at McDonald's. Your hairline inspired their logo!
My screen lock is my favorite picture of my wife. When I'm on a 14-hour shift, being miserable, hating my life... I pull out my phone and gaze at the picture of my wife. Then I realize it's better here than at home with her ass.
Why did Daveon get fired from his job at the orange juice factory? Because he couldn't concentrate.
The worst part about working for the department of unemployment is when you get fired, you still have to show up the next day.
What do you call a white woman working at an all black company?
Crack/her
Did you know your pupils are the last part to stop working when you die? They dilate.
Just got a new internet connected toaster. It wouldn't work until I enabled pop-ups!
Be grateful:
You're missing work today because in the past, someone cared enough to leave that banana peel on the stairs.
Did you hear about the delivery boy that worked for that Italian Restaurant down the street?
Yeah, he Pasta-Way.
Wanna hear a construction joke?
Nah, I'm still working on it.
I saw your mother get into a white Ford Taurus on the corner of Milton and Halliburton, and you're still trying to tell me she ain't got no job cause she "can't get a ride to work?"